Page 20 of Hunting My Vampire

Some I’d killed myself but there was no need to go into any of that. “Trust me,” I said. “I have regrets.”

“Tell me about one. Tell me about one regret.”

I paused.

I didn’t know how to tell her that my kind didn’t feel regret the way humans did. Our emotions were different, practically non-existent. We had desires but it wasn’t the same.

But this was about trust. I knew enough about humans to realize that she felt I needed to give her something.

“All right,” I said, slowly, trying to buy time.

I had to think of a memory that didn’t incriminate me too much or make me look too calculating in her eyes. It had to be true though. I didn’t want to risk being caught out in a lie.

Still, I had to give Kaya something, so I dug deep.

“My sister.”

Kaya smiled.

“You had a sister?”

I nodded slowly.

I had not thought about Flora in a long, long time. But we had been close, in my time, before I was turned. We had grown up at the castle and we had spent all our free time together, roaming the woods, going horseback riding. We had the same tastes, disliked the same people. When my father gave me the choice of immortal life she had begged me not to do it. I tried to persuade her to come with me but she would not.

“I told her nothing would change between us but it did.”

I hadn’t even realized how soon. The Eastern War broke out and my father, Simon and I had left to fight for our family. We were away for many years. In that time, my mother passed away and my sister had gone on to marry a wealthy farmer up north. By the time I saw her again, I barely recognized her. Shehad changed and we had lost our way with one another. I didn’t even know how to talk to her. She had become an old woman, talking of the weather and the ailments of her children. She was lost to me and she hadn’t even died yet.

“So… what is your regret?”

“I suppose I regret losing her,” I said.

It struck me that my words were true. Flora had been more than a sister; she had been a partner. Her world had been my world. My father was much older than I was, and Simon and I had never gotten along. I didn’t want to talk to Kaya about him yet. But when I lost Flora, I lost my first real friend, and I hadn’t had that many since then either.

“Do you regret… turning?” Kaya asked.

“No,” I said. “It was always who I was going to be. I will say that I didn’t know at the time what lay ahead but, looking back, I do understand the decision I made and I’m glad I made it.”

Kaya looked at me pensively, I had a feeling that she knew there was more to the story but she nodded slowly, and said nothing else.

“Okay,” she said quietly, after a while.

“I will go and see your medicine man.”

Chapter 9

Kaya

Princess didn’t like me going away. She tried not to say anything but I saw how she hung her head and stuck out her lip. I felt sorry for the kid but this was something I needed to do. I couldn’t tell her that I’d had this rage all my life, never knowing what to do with it. Becoming an assassin had been the perfect outlet for this anger but it was never enough. Others had commented on it, how I zoned in on targets, how focused I became on total annihilation. I knew no mercy. Each time, I was avenging my family, the deaths of my father, mother and brother.

What if it hadn’t been a vampire?

Jack’s questions had opened a snake pit of questions in my mind. Things I had started wondering about too. My father was no coward and he had been heavily armed. Why attack all of us together?

Princess asked me, “Are you going with him?”

I nodded. I didn’t have to ask who she was referring to.