Page 16 of Her Vampire Hero

Rook blinked. “It’s 2024 already?”

“Yeah.”

“So the world didn’t end in Y2K?”

“Not even close.Closehappened in 2020, but that’s a story for another time. Trust me. It can wait.” Jenny leaned against the car, taking a sip of her tea. "You know, this whole cursed town thing reminds me of my parents' last camping trip."

Rook raised an eyebrow. "I wasn't aware camping could be quite so supernatural."

"Oh, trust me, that trip was cursed if I've ever seen one." Jenny chuckled, shaking her head. "My dad was city boy through and through. He decided they were going to save money by taking a camping vacation out in the wilderness.”

"I'm sensing this doesn't end well," Rook said, amusement dancing in his eyes.

"Understatement of the century." Jenny set down her mug. "First night, Dad realizes he forgot the tent poles. So they're sleeping under a sad, flappy tarp."

Rook winced sympathetically. "I take it that wasn't the end of their troubles?"

"Oh no, we're just getting started. Mom wakes up covered in poison ivy. And I mean covered." Jenny gestured wildly. "Places poison ivy has no business being, if you catch my drift."

Rook's eyes widened. "Oh dear."

"Yeah, 'oh dear' is right. But wait, it gets better." Jenny paused for dramatic effect. "Final night, they hear this noise outside. Dad goes to investigate, thinking it's a raccoon or something."

"Let me guess, not a raccoon?"

Jenny grinned. "Nope. Try a five-hundred-pound black bear. It took one look at Dad in his tighty-whities and decided he was no threat and that their cooler looked like a nice snack."

Rook burst out laughing.

"Oh yes. By the time the rangers chased it off, the bear had destroyed the tent, eaten all their food, and Dad had run so far into the woods they needed a search party to find him. Mom tried playing dead, and luckily the bear was more interested in the food than the Mom-tent burrito."

"I'm almost afraid to ask, but what happened after that?"

"Mom looked Dad dead in the eye, still itching in places I don't want to think about, and said, 'I want a divorce.' Dad just nodded and said, 'Yeah, that's fair.'"

Jenny enjoyed the way Rook's eyes crinkled at the corners when he laughed. "Your turn. Spill some embarrassing stories. And don't try to tell me you don't have any, after however many centuries you've been around."

"I have plenty. But I warn you, they may shatter your illusions of vampire mystique."

"Hit me," Jenny challenged, settling in more comfortably against the car.

"Picture it," he said, gesturing dramatically. "New York City, 1985. The hair was big, the stakes were higher, and I, in my infinite wisdom, decided to try my hand at this new 'speed dating' phenomenon."

Jenny snickered, already anticipating where this was going.

"Now, you must understand," Rook continued, "the concept of 'vampire speed' is quite different from what humans mean by 'speed dating.' I took it quite literally."

"Oh no," Jenny groaned, grinning.

"Oh yes." Rook nodded solemnly. "I would sit down, introduce myself, and before the poor woman could even open her mouth, I'd have recited my entire life story—or at least the parts fit for mortal ears—commented on her perfume, and asked her thoughts on the sociopolitical climate of 15th century Romania."

"You didn't."

"I most certainly did. By the time the bell rang to switch partners, I'd been through my entire spiel with at least a dozen women. The organizers were baffled. The participants were terrified. And I... well, I was rather proud of my efficiency."

"Please tell me someone called you out on it."

Rook's expression turned sheepish. "As a matter of fact, the last woman I spoke to—a rather formidable librarian named Ethel—grabbed me by the ear and told me in no uncertain terms that if I didn't slow down and let a lady get a word in edgewise, I'd be single forever."

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