Page 5 of Cursed Wolfsbane

As I brush a few stray tears off my cheeks, Uncle Vale looks at my blank face and empty eyes. His brows dip in worry, but he doesn’t say anything.

“Can we go see Xander?” I ask flatly. Either I feel everything or nothing. There’s no in-between for me.

“Yes. Bee….” Uncle Vale trails off like he can’t figure out what to say.

Before he has a chance to ask about the change in me, I turn on my heel. Striding toward where I saw Xander heading, Ifollow the voices drifting from my left. It doesn’t take me long to find Xander’s room.

When I step inside, the doctor is snapping off his bloody gloves. Xander’s hooked up to an IV and covered by a hospital sheet. His shoulder is clean and stitched up. Instead of pained, Xander’s face looks peaceful—maybe the most peaceful I’ve ever seen it.

The doctor looks up and gives me a bright smile. “You’ll be pleased to know Xander is healing quicker than expected. The bullet nicked an artery, but it was already almost healed by the time I sutured his wound. We gave him a sedative to help his healing along. He should wake up in about twenty-four hours.”

“That’s good,” I stammer, unsure why the doctor isn’t pissed at me for yelling at him earlier. It freaks me out that he’s being so nice. I don’t really know how to react.

Yelling and screaming?

I know exactly how to respond.

Niceties?

Not so much.

There’s definitely something wrong with me that pleasantries freak me out and rage doesn’t.

“I apologize about earlier. I never would have gotten between you and your mate had I known,” the doctor tells me as he checks over Xander one last time.

“Um, that’s okay,” I mumble, embarrassed about my behavior. There wasn’t any reason for me to yell at the man just doing his job.

“Well, I’ll get out of your hair, then. I’m right down the hall if you need anything. I’ll be back in a couple of hours to check on him.” The doctor gives me a kind smile and a friendly pat on the shoulder before leaving.

“I need to head out as well,” Uncle Vale informs us. “We need to clean the scene before anyone stumbles on it.” He gives me akiss on the head before nodding at Malachi and Bastian. “Let me know if you need anything. Your mom should be down soon.” He strides out of the room, and the door closes behind him with a soft snick.

“How are you, pretty girl?” Bastian pushes his golden hair out of his face as he looks at me from Xander’s bedside.

“Fine,” I manage to choke out.

Of course I’m fine.

I always am.

It’s everyone around me who isn’t.

First, I got my mom killed. If I hadn’t been born, Patrick couldn’t have blackmailed her. Then, I put Ava in danger for the past seven years. If I were a better sister, I would have gotten her away from him sooner. And now, I got Xander shot. The only reason he was in the parking lot and almost died was because of me.

I hurt everyone around me, and I’m so fucking sick of it.

It wouldn’t surprise me if Malachi and Bastian hate me now for what happened to their brother. It was always bound to happen. No one stays around for very long. But, goddamn, does it hurt. My heart is so battered and bruised I wonder how it can still function.

The walls of the infirmary start to feel like they’re closing in on me. My heart gallops in my chest, and my breath saws in and out of my lungs in harsh pants. Blackness creeps into the edges of my vision as I try to get my breathing under control.

It takes me a moment to realize I’m having a panic attack.Fuck.Leave it to me to make someone else getting hurt about me.

Will I ever stop being so selfish?

I don’t know. But I do know I need to get out of here before the Wyldharts witness my breakdown. They don’t need to deal with me losing it on top of worrying about their brother. Withoutlooking at either of them, I manage to whisper, “I need some fresh air.”

Keeping my head down, I turn toward the door. Heaving the surprisingly heavy slab of wood open, I calmly walk into the hallway. As soon as the door shuts, I take off at a sprint. I don’t know where I’m going, but I know I need to get out of here.

CHAPTER 3

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