Page 75 of Runaway Hearts: Seduced by Danger

Despite myself, I lean my head into the crook of his neck.

But then, his lips trail up to my neck. “This is all I’ve wanted,” he whispers as his mouth traces hot, wet kisses on my nape, sending fireworks through my body. “Just you.” His forehead falls on my shoulder with a sigh.

Goosebumps wake across my skin. The heat from his body seeps through the thin fabric of my PJs, warming my frozen soul and bringing peace like a blooming winter rose.

I place one hand over his arm, the other reaching up to grab his neck, and I hug him with all that I am. My heart cracks open. Sadness wets my eyes as my body melts against his, and I forget about the emptiness in my soul while he hugs me with the intensity of a man who’s been love-starved.

My fingers tangle in his hair, and I pull him closer, holding him like my lifeline.

It’s the best hug I’ve ever received.

I never want it to end. Which surprises me because I can’t remember a time when I had a man curled up in my personal space and didn’t feel the overwhelming need to push him away.

This serenity is foreign. A glimmer of hope I had long given up on begins to shine through.

I want to feel loved.

But then, something inside me snaps. My body trembles as safety spreads in my every cell like an antidote. Tears start slowly, then turn into a flood, cascading down my face and soaking my pillow. I try to contain my sobs, but they escape in loud, gut-wrenching wails. All the pain, anxiety, and frustration I’ve been holding back for so long is finally being released.

Kai’s grip on me tightens, his lips brushing the back of my neck as he whispers comforting words in my ear. “It’s okay, cutie. You can let your guard down. I’ve got you.”

I take a shaky breath, trying to regain control of my emotions. “I’m s-sorry.” I hiccup, ashamed of myself for breaking down like this.

“Don’t be. I’d rather have you falling apart in my arms than hiding behind a mask that doesn’t fit you.”

The sincerity in his voice brings on another deluge of tears. But for once, it feels cathartic instead of shameful. Kai holds me until my sobs subsided to sniffles. And even then, he doesn’t let go.

I feel safe in his arms. So, so safe.

Is this what I truly need?

A dangerous man whose violence can protect me from my own destructive thoughts.

Chapter 15

The Morning After

The next morning, I woke up drained and alone. There’s a massive blue teddy bear where Kai should be.

I frown. “What are you looking at, Bonsaï? Never seen a woman wake up before?” I squeeze the toy and sigh.

My brain threatens to shrink under the lack of peaceful sleep, but I refuse to take my pills after the nightmare they caused last time. Rubbing my groggy eyes, I stare at the ceiling, wondering what’s coming. There are still thirteen hours to our road trip. Then, it’ll be beach and tequila.

So much can happen in those hours, and a part of me knows that my life will never be the same when I leave this house. A small smile tugs at my lips as I wonder if Kai would stay with me in Nay. I’d have to ask. Parting ways doesn’t thrill me. At all.

Moments of the fair replay in my mind, the fun and the lightness, the pond and the kiss.

I need time to understand my emotions. But one thing is clear now: the ball is in my court, and I’m terrified of making the wrong choice.

I need a hug.

The sweet melody of the espresso machine pulls me out of bed. I make a quick trip to the bathroom to freshen up, but my reflection stops me. My arms are sprinkled with fine scratches, and a bruise adorns my left shoulder from falling into the pond.

I face the mirror, trying to find things I like about myself. I used to love my eyes. The rich brown color and curled thick lashes create a stunning effect. But it’s ruined by the everlasting pain showing through. My stare traces the contour of my breasts, my waist, my thick thighs.

Kai’s voices rings in my head.“You’re much more beautiful now.”

I wish I could see it. At least my breasts aren’t saggy.

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