Page 58 of Tainted

“No, it wasn’t, and that’s the fuckin’ problem. You can’t have her, so I can’t either?”

“Don’t make me out to be some hypocrite,” Sydney warned.

Plopping on the bed, I yawned because this conversation took longer than I wanted. “I’m just pointing out facts, Syd.”

“Here’s another one. I was honest about my feelings and intentions. You made it seem like it was all me, and how you were cuddled with her tells me otherwise. You brought her to your house! That alone tells me everything I need to know.”

I knew what it felt like not being Sydney’s first choice. She didn’t because, in the hierarchy of women in my life, Mom was the only one above her. Now, Syd felt threatened because she was used to me coming through for her whenever she needed me.

“Not getting your way has you spiraling.”

“Fuck you, Keyes.”

“Who did it this time?”

Aside from her obsession with Zara, her parents were the only thing that could make her so erratic that she made no sense.

“Dad added adoption to his campaign platform. He wants to use my fuckin’ story to sell the dream as if he gives a fuck what women want.”

“What are you going to do about that?”

“What can I do?” She asked, sitting on the bed.

“It’s a lot youcando, but if you don’t see that, I don’t know what to say.”

“It’s not that simple.”

Sydney successfully plucked my fuckin’ nerves, but watching her fumble with her fingers over something that wasn’t her fault softened my heart. So I swept her in my arms, pulling her close enough to rest my chin on her shoulder.

“I’m sorry.”

“Stop apologizing. It’s not your fault, Kenyon.”

It didn’t matter how many times Sydney tried to absolve me of guilt. We both knew her driving my car was the catalyst for everything that night.

Her lungs inhaled as much air as they could hold. “Your bed smells like her.”

“Don’t say that out loud again. You sound creepy as fuck.”

“But that’s why you love me,” Sydney smiled.

“Start trippin’ again, and love won’t stop me from putting your ass in a headlock.”

“Anyway. I’m hungry. What are we eating?” she asked like it wasn’t the middle of the night.

“I bet walking in here showing your ass has to be exhausting.”

“You weren’t answering or texting back. Excuse me for being worried about your black ass.”

“Excused, you’re feeding yourself. I’m going back to sleep.”

I closed my eyes, trying to ignore my thoughts racing. What was it about Zara that made everything different? She made everything with Sydney feel distant and old. Zara was something new. Something I hadn’t even known I was looking for.

9

Zara

It had been days since I last saw Kenyon, and the silence between us was suffocating. Each hour without a text or call gnawed at me like an itch I couldn’t scratch. I missed him. The weight of it hung heavy in my chest, an ache that wouldn't go away no matter how much I tried to push it down.

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