Page 49 of Tainted

“What’s your mom’s name?” His fingers curled and fumbled against the small of my back, pulling me from the downward spiral. “Zara Nicole.”

Instinctively, my neck turned to Kenyon. “Hmm.”

“What’s mom’s name?”

“S-Shana.”

Kenyon gripped my chin, turning me to face him. “You look like you’d have a Shana.”

It was the first time I’d really seen him smile. It was different, away from all the chaos. It curved up slowly, as if he didn’t smile like this often, but when he did, it was real.

“What does having a Shana look like?” I asked, pulling myself from his trance.

He cocked his head, appraising me while my body ached, craving his fingertips again.

“Average height and slim with slanted eyes. Wide nose and lips that make perfection look so fuckin’ pretty when you smile. But that forehead.”

Kenyon’s assessment warmed me from the inside out, so I did the only thing I could, “I’d rather have a big forehead than a flat one any day.”

“Better to have a flat forehead than a flat chest.” Kenyon’s index finger swiped at my breast. Clenching my fist, I struck him, but he laughed it off, “Aye, don’t be ashamed. Lil’ boobies taste just as good.” He informed me, trying to shield himself from my fist. “Chill and tell me what Mom wants to do today?”

I should’ve known the answer, but I didn’t. I hadn’t knownShanain a long time. The person she became after witness protection wasn’t the mom who used to take me to the boardwalk, who laughed easily and lived freely. That Shana was buried somewhere under layers of new identities.

“I… I don’t know,” I admitted, my voice smaller than I meant.

I could feel him waiting, hoping I’d keep talking, but how could I explain something I barely understood. The memories of who she used to be were so tangled up with the person she became even I struggled to separate them.

“When I was little, we used to go to the Boardwalk,” I added, forcing a smile that didn’t quite reach my eyes. “She used to take me there all the time. It was our place before everything changed.” My voice cracked slightly.

He nodded, his eyes never leaving mine, as he stood up and offered me a hand.

“Then we’re going to the Boardwalk.”

His use ofwemade me pause for a moment. It was a small gesture, but it felt like a warm hand against my back, reassuring in a way I wasn’t quite ready to admit. Despite the tangled mess of emotions, I smiled just a little.

The drive to the boardwalk was quiet. As we got closer, the carousel revealed itself. All my childhood memories of begging Shana to ride back-to-back came flooding back. Kenyon parked near the entrance, the scent of saltwater and fried food already filling the air. The boardwalk stretched out before us, and I found myself glancing at Kenyon, trying to gauge his mood before we walked into whatever the evening held.

“Do you come down here often?” I asked.

Kenyon scoffed, then broke into a sexy grin. “Fuck no.”

“Why’d you say it like that?”

“The Boardwalk isn’t my thing unless I grab something to eat.”

“What is yourthing? Other than threesomes.”

Kenyon’s chin dropped before leaning his body into mine, causing me to stumble.

“Keep talking, and I’ll leave your ass down here.”

My eyes widened reading the sign that brought back so many memories. I latched on to Kenyon’s arm like I used to with Mom.

“We have to go to Luna’s Sweet Treats! I haven’t been in forever!”

“You’re not going today either because it’s not about you,” he smirked, leaning against the old wooden railing and chewing on the same piece of gum.

“I’m the center of her universe. She would want me to be happy,” I argued, throwing my hands on my hips. Then, suddenly, I was hit with a layer of sadness I wasn’t expecting.

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