Page 126 of Thorns of Malice

I shouldn't be thinking about Dax caring about me. It's dangerous.

I should. He's trying.

No, it'll never be right between us,I tell myself.

I'm lost in my thoughts again when my phone beeps. I go to the counter, pick it up, and my gut dives.

Jaxon: I need to see you.

My nerves pick up. I think about what to reply.

Me: I don't think that's a good idea.

Jaxon: I won't try to have sex with you, I promise. But we need to talk.

Me: Did you have sex last night?

A few minutes pass.

Jaxon: No.

Me: Then you're still jonesing for it.

Jaxon: We need to talk. I'll leave today, but not until we talk.

Me: Why don't you go to a club? Or find someone online? I know it's what you need, so why don't you do it? I'm not going to change my mind.

He calls.

I sigh and reluctantly answer. "Hey."

His voice sounds desperate. "Ivy, I have to see you. I'm at the Harbor Inn. Please come. I'm in room 428."

"Jaxon, I can't."

"You can. Just come over. It'll be like it always has been between us. I'm sorry I said that about loving you. I won't do it again, I promise," he declares.

I'm relieved at hearing that. "Well, that's good because that was some crazy talk yesterday."

"Yes, it was, and I'm sorry. But, Ivy, I need you. You know what I'm going through."

I feel a pang of guilt, but I can't be Jaxon's go-to anymore. So I reply, "I know all too well what it's like, Jaxon. But you need someone else, not me. We can't do this anymore."

"Because of him?" he accuses.

I stay quiet, my heart beating faster.

"It is because of him, isn't it?" Jaxon pushes.

"Yes. I still have feelings for Dax."

Jaxon warns, "He's going to destroy you again."

"Maybe so, but I can't help it. I still love him," I confess.

"No, Ivy. You don't love him. You love what you think you had with him—what you've always wanted. He's just playing you again," he insists.

"He's not!" I interject, the words coming out of my mouth before I realize it.