Page 119 of Thorns of Malice

"I don't want to take advantage of you."

"It's you or him."

"It's not him. It's never going to be him," I remind her, determined that she'll never touch him again.

"Then fuck me."

I still don't move.

"Don't suddenly become moral on me, Dax!"

I continue to grapple about whether I should have sex with her or not. We both want it, but I want her to want me more than just because of the urges tormenting her.

Does she still love me after everything I've done, or does every cell in her body only want me due to the effects of Trance?

She pushes on my chest. "Fine. Have it your way. I'll go back to Jaxon."

I grab her wrists. "Tell me you'll never go to him again."

She squeezes her eyes shut.

I desperately demand, "Tell me you don't want him."

She opens her eyes. "You know I don't want him."

Relief washes over me. "Then tell me you'll never go to him again."

She opens her mouth and then shuts it.

"You just told me you don't want him," I remind her.

She shuts her eyes again, shaking her head, her voice cracking. "You don't understand what this is like. I can't control myself. When things get bad..." She opens her eyes. "I'm at the breaking point right now, Dax. And when I get here, I do things that I hate...things I'm ashamed of...things you'll never understand."

My heart hurts, feeling the depths of her pain. I insist, "I understand. It's okay."

She sarcastically laughs. "No, it's not okay."

"I didn't mean it like that."

"Either you fuck me, or I'm going to go fuck him. Make a choice. I-I can't have you near me and not fuck me when I'm like this," she confesses.

"Baby girl?—"

She reaches between my legs, grabbing my cock. "I know you want me."

"It's not about wanting you. I always have and always will."

Her voice grows louder. "Then what do you want from me? Tell me, because I'm over this guessing game!"

I don't hesitate. "Tell me you'll never use him again. You can use me as much as you need, but no one else. You and me only."

Her eyes fill with more water. She shakes her head. "You're asking for the impossible."

"No, I'm not."

"You are!"

My chest tightens. "Why is it so impossible? Hmm? Tell me, gorgeous."

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