Page 82 of Smith

I had more important things to think about than whatever was going on with them.

“Aria.”I felt my body shaking and not from anything I was doing.

“Huh?”

“Baby, wake up.”

I didn’t want to wake up. I wanted to sleep forever in my nice warm cocoon that became not so warm when my body jostled again.

With gallant effort, I pried an eye open. The TV was now off and the blanket Smith had covered us with when we’d laid down on his couch to watch a show was no longer tucked around me, nor was his big warm body behind me.

“Ugh.”

“Come on, let’s go to bed.”

A bed did sound nice. However, getting my legs to work was a whole ’nother story.

After some shifting, lifting, and twisting, I was on my feet, then I was up cradled in Smith’s arms. My head on his shoulder, I opened my eyes, tipped them up, and had Smith in profile. In the shadowed dark I saw his strong jaw line. Without thought, my hand lifted, went to his neck, and my thumb grazed over a day’s worth of stubble.

Smith came to a stop. His chin dipped down and there in the shadowed dark, his eyes locked with mine. Not just locked but fused. Something was happening. Something I didn’t fully get but it was no less profound, no less beautiful, no less intimate. No words were spoken but that didn’t mean Smith wasn’t communicating. I watched with avid fascination as the warmth, care, affection, lust, and longing filtered through his eyes. A tremor ran through my body. I knew Smith felt it when the longing turned into regret and sorrow. And just like that, he closed down. But not before I saw it—remorse.

I stayed silent as he continued the journey to the bedroom. I didn’t say a word when he set me on my feet next to the bed, gently undressed me, then himself, before he yanked back the comforter and sheet. I remained quiet when he motioned for me to climb in, did the same, and curled his body around me. This was different. Normally we slept with my head on his chest, my arm and legs draped overhim,or him snug up against my back. Never had he cuddled into me with his arm around my chest, leg over my thigh pinningmeto the bed.

I didn’t know what this change meant. I did know as good as it felt, it frightened me. It took some maneuvering but I got my arm where I needed it so I could do to him what he did to me and run my fingers through his close-cropped hair. It wasn’t thesame, since he tangled his fingers in the stands and mine was more like a scalp rub. Smith burrowed deeper and I laid there in the dark holding him, praying this wasn’t the beginning of the end, fearing it was, and not knowing how I was going to pull him back.

Those were my thoughts as I drifted back to sleep.

The next morning when I woke up, I knew I was right to worry.

Smith was up and showered before I opened my eyes.

The kiss he gave me before we left for his office was by rote.

No touching, no sex, no sweet looks, no hand-holding, no teasing.

He’d fully disengaged.

CHAPTER NINETEEN

“Heard good things about your woman.” Cash wasted no time plucking my last nerve. “Heard about her, thought Jonas was exaggerating. Seems he wasn’t.”

I stared out the windshield wondering how I’d gotten myself into this situation. Not with Aria—I knew damn good and well how that had happened. I’d lost my motherfucking mind and got sucked into everything that was her. Now I was so far down the rabbit hole it was going to take time to dig myself out. The first part of extraditing my head from my ass was no more sex. No more touching, no more cuddling, no more teasing, kissing, and no more holding her hand like the lovesick idiot I was. And there was no denying I was sick, terminally fucking ill. Last night, curled into Aria, I took the last I was going to take from her. She’d seen it because I couldn’t hide it. I’d gone and done the unforgivable and fallen in love with her. I’d felt her shiver when I silently told her. And I knew she knew how sorry I was I had to let her go.

The quicker the better.

She was already in deep with Kira, Jonas, and Ivy. This morning she’d met Layla, Cash, Theo, Easton, Kevin, and Nebraska. As she had with Jonas, she’d charmed the fuck outof the rest of the men on my team and it had taken less than ten minutes for the woman-bonding to start with Layla and Nebraska.

I had to do this right with surgical precision so those friendships could stay intact and Aria wouldn’t hate me.

“You can ignore me but I know you heard me,” Cash pushed.

“You probably don’t wanna do this with me,” I advised.

“Do what? Tell you I think your woman’s the shit.” He purposely misunderstood me as he swerved into the left lane, overtook two cars, then quickly veered back into the right lane, nearly kissing the bumper of the car in front of us.

“Christ,” I cursed. “It’s like you’ve forgotten how to drive.”

“There’s nothing wrong with my driving,” he lied.

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