Page 96 of Smith

“Of course it’s my fucking fault!”

Christ.

My head felt it was going to split in two.

I needed to get the fuck out of here.

Aria knew.

I gave her the ‘why’ she wanted.

Now it was time to do what I did best and wash my hands of this fucked-up mess.

I would never be who Aria needed. Never be what she deserved.

Like father, like son.

When the going got rough, I didn’t have it in me to stay.

CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

Smith was wrecked. No, not wrecked—annihilated.

I’d never seen a man or woman look so utterly destroyed. His agitation filled the room to the point of stifling. Tension seized his body. His tall frame rigid. His features harsh and furious. He was in absolute agony and I didn’t know how to stop it.

Worse, it looked like I wasn’t going to get the chance when he turned, his direction clear—the front door.

“Don’t leave.”

“You got what you wanted.” His sneer was ugly and hateful and made me cringe.

“What is it you think I want?”

Smith’s torso swung back, his brows pulled tighter, and his fury became tangible—it was its own living, moving entity. So intense and foreboding I could taste it.

And it scared the hell out of me. I didn’t believe for a second Smith would ever touch me in anger. I wasn’t even afraid he’d turn his anger on me and use his words to slice me to shreds. No, my fear wasforhim. He looked like he was about to come out of his skin. Or better yet, he wanted to.

“Aria—”

“What happened to…” Thankfully, I caught myself before I said Valerie’s name, something that for whatever reason was a hard no, and quickly covered by saying. “your ex and her mom wasn’t your fault. You didn’t push?—”

“Ihappened to them.Me.” He jabbed his finger at his chest. “I should’ve left it alone.”

He couldn’t mean that. Leaving it alone meant leaving a girl to her abusive father.

“Left it alone? You mean, leave the girl you loved to get beat? Is that what you’re saying?You, the man you are, should’ve left her to her life? You could no more turn a blind eye to someone being hurt as you could be the one who caused the harm.”

“You have no idea?—”

“Bullshit. Bull-fucking-shit, Smith Everette. There’s nothing you can say that will ever convince me you should’ve or could’ve walked away from that girl. I don’t know what happened to make her go back to that man but I do know it wasn’t your fault.”

Smith’s mouth curved up into a sardonic smile so obnoxious I wished I’d never seen it.

“I quit, that’s what happened. I was fed up having to beg her to stay. I was tired of spending weeks talking her into staying with me for it only to last a few months, then we were right back to it. The merry-go-round was fucking exhausting. I was new to the teams, busting my ass at work trying to prove myself, then I went home at night and had to prove myself to her. Prove I was good enough, prove she was safe with me, prove I loved her. It never ended. And she never gave up trying to get her mom to leave and come live with us. I was all for this. What I wasn’t all for was the fallout of those calls. After she talked to her mom, she spiraled. Weeks getting her back. A month, two if I was lucky, of living life. And that’s all I was doing—living life. Not living my dream, not living happily with my girl, not living knowing I had a sweet, pretty girl at home waiting for me. Living life worriedwhen the shitstorm would hit. And when the last one hit, it was a fucking tsunami and I fucking quit trying to convince her to stay.”

I hated that for him more than I hated he grew up with a mom that didn’t love him the way he deserved to be loved.

“You can’t hold someone hostage?—”

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