Page 16 of Nanny for the Firefighter

As I watch her pour the tea, my eyes roam over the counter and ledges in front of the window above the sink.

They’re still covered in potted plants, the pots themselves completely different from one another in varying rustic patterns and warm terracotta colors.

The farmhouse sink with its small dark bronze faucet is speckled with water like Mom just rinsed it out, and Mom has sourdough batter resting on the counter nearby to rise.

God, it’s like I never left.

My eyes burn as I hold back the tears, raking my stare over every nook and cranny.

From the classic metal stool tucked under the counter at the far end of the room to the dark specs and marks in the wood floor, from the thick shelves mounted to the wall above the stove that hold all my mom’s crockery and jars of spices to the plants growing everywhere bringing in life and color, I admire it all.

“Here you go, sweetheart. Now,” my mom sits down between Hudson and me, the radiator whining in the corner, “would you please tell your poor sick mother what’s been keeping you away for so long?”

My shoulders slump. I knew this was coming, of course, but now that I’m here, telling my family the dirty details of my failed relationship with Jai is just as daunting as it ever was.

Sighing, I take a sip of the tea before I start. They both eye me, and I have to assume they know this has something to do with my ex.

I can’t tell them everything. They’ll freak out. Mom’s illness needs to be the focus.

“Well,” I set the glass down, buying myself another few seconds, “the LA thing didn’t work out. I wanted to try singing, but…yeah. Things with Jai got…complicated. Needless to say, it didn’t work out. But I tried for a long time to make it happen. I’m…I’m sorry for being gone for so long.”

Mom reaches out and takes my hand, patting it gently. “Oh, honey. What happened?”

I shake my head. “He just wasn’t the man I thought he was. It was better for us to be done.”

Hudson clears his throat, and I glance over at him as he raises his brows at me. “If it didn’t work, you could have come back. There’s always a place here for you.”

I hang my head. I know he’s right, but I couldn’t come home. Jai is…bringing him into their lives is a terrible idea.

The only reason I’m here now is because of Mom’s illness. Still, I know I can’t tell them about all that. Keeping them in the dark is the right thing to do.

“I know. I do. I just…I wanted to figure out who I am, what I wanted. I decided to travel around, see the sights, see if I could get to every state I could. It was okay. I worked odd jobs, I traveled to so many interesting places, and I’ve seen more of this country than most of the people who live here.”

“Well,” Mom says, squeezing my hand as she locks eyes with me, “I’m glad you’re here now. And you’re staying put for a while. Understood? I won’t have you up and leaving again now that you’re back home.”

I smile, but it’s weak. “Okay, Mom. Whatever you say.”

But nausea burns in my gut, and my pulse kicks up again. Staying here longer than a few days is a risk. I thought two weeks was bad, but if Mom wants me around for good…

That’s too risky.

Part of me wants to say that it’s been three years, so there’s no way Jai is still looking for me. But I just can’t believe that.

He’s been relentless, and somehow, I can always feel his eyes on me—watching.

I can see the other questions burning across my mother and brother’s features, but I’m done with this conversation.

“So, Hudson managed to land me a job already. I’ll be around at least for that.”

My mom sits up straighter in her chair, eyeing Hudson as she cocks her head. “Oh, did you now?”

Unable to stop the grin, I laugh lightly as Mom glares over at Hudson. Her familiar blue eyes lock onto his, and she tucks one of her graying curls behind her ear.

Hudson narrows his eyes at both of us, smiling even as the corners of his mouth turn down.

“It’s with Mason. He needs a nanny, and Bridget is great with kids.”

Just like that Mom perks up, smiling over at me. “Oh, well, that’s excellent then.”

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