Page 158 of Forget

My heat ended after twelve hours, and I spent a lot of it sleeping. It’s a miracle drug, but I can understand why Shaw was so worried about my using them, since the effects are so varied for everyone.

Now, I’m headed into work, feeling better than I usually do after a typical heat. I can see why this feeling would be addicting to people, but I just want the men I live with to fix their lives. I came down this morning to find a full breakfast laid out on the kitchen table.

Usually, I wouldn’t bother with breakfast, but it looked too good and I was starving.

Aiden is driving me today, and I sit quietly in the passenger seat.

“Are you afraid of me?” he asks, surprising me.

Huh. Am I?

“I don’t know,” I say softly. “I don’t know how to act around you anymore, so it’s easier to sit in my corner and say nothing.”

“I suck at apologies because I never think they’re good enough and then overthink them,” he says. “I want, crave, and need you to acknowledge me, but the truth is you shouldn’t have to if you don’t want to. There’s nothing that says in our biology that you have to.”

I stare out the window as I take that in, because that’s not completely true. My body recognizes him, and during my normal heats, it physically hurts to have him not be near me. It reminds me again and again how Mom rejected her scent match to keep me safe.

How did she do it?

How much did she suffer in her decision?

“Some of my biology does,” I murmur. I’m not trying to be a brat, just truthful.

“That’s true,” he says. “You could reject me, though.”

“What?” I ask, startled.

“If you verbally reject me, then the push and pull between us ends,” he says calmly. “You wouldn’t want me during your heats, just the other guys in our pack. Since you’ve bonded to them, there’s no escaping that. However, you can end what’s between us very easily. Just say the words.”

“Do you want me to do that?” I ask. Swallowing hard, I think about the ramifications of that. Would it hurt him? What isn’t he telling me? “Aiden.”

Inhaling sharply, he jerks the wheel, almost driving us into a snow drift. Fuck.

“I’m good,” he promises, voice sounding hoarse. “My name on your lips just sounded so much better than I thought it would. No, I don’t want you to do that, but it’s not about me. What we’re doing isn’t healthy, Aisling. If you want your out, you’ve got it.”

Blinking hard, I take a deep breath. I didn’t think that would hurt as much as it did to hear him say that. I wanted him to fight harder for me.

“I don’t know what is going through that pretty little head, but let me add this,” Aiden says. “I’m nowhere near done trying to show you how sorry I am for what I’ve done, however it won’t be through words. I’m not great at those, as you see. I am not giving you up, I just want you to know that if it gets too hard, I understand, okay?”

Nodding, I let my hair slide in front of me to cover my face, the tears falling down splash onto my glove-covered hands. I found these tucked into my coat, and I have no idea who gave them to me.

They have a plush lining, let me use my touchscreen easier, and are really warm. Somehow, the guys continue to take care of me for some reason.

Aiden drops his hand on mine, squeezing it as he drives and doesn’t say another word, simply letting me sit in my feelings. Sometimes, that’s what I need. My emotions are big, which makes it feel unmanageable when it all crashes over me like now.

By the time we make it toOmega’s Haven,I’m subdued and ready to walk in.

“Are you planning to be here most of the day?” Aiden asks.

“Yes,” I tell him. “I have admin things to do, and then I’m in the outreach center for the rest of the day.”

“I have some errands to do, but I’m going to bring you lunch,” he says as I nod and get out of the vehicle.

Wow, did I just have a civilized conversation with Aiden? I’m not sure what just happened, but I like it. My shoulders aren’t up to my ears when I walk into work, and I feel good.

The only thing that slightly dings my happiness is an email from theRegional Omegas’ Women’s Society.

Scowling, I read the email yet again as I call Wren. She responded to it but forwarded it to my personal email so I would also see it.

---