Page 153 of Forget

Sitting up, I stretch like a cat before standing. There’s a cold bottle of water next to me that I brought up earlier, and I take a sip before slowly walking around my nest. I’m starting to cramp a little, so I’m testing my pain levels.

It’s not too bad, but I’m starting to want some fresh air. I don’t want to run into anyone, which means going downstairs isn’t an option. I heard voices when I woke up an hour ago, confirming my need to find fresh air another way.

Examining the stained glass windows, I realize that they open out. Lips parted in surprise, I unlock them and push, sighing happily as the freezing cold air blows in.

I shouldn’t want this since it’s snowing outside again, but as I shove my arms outside and the snowflakes hit my skin, I realize how overheated I actually was.

The sky is gray and overcast, making it difficult to tell what time it is, yet it doesn’t matter to me. No one needs me, I can just be. I turned my phone off a couple of hours ago as well.

It’s kind of liberating to have a phone that doesn’t vibrate, light up, or ring. Fuck, I need a vacation, I just don’t have the time to be able to.

Leaning out the window, I close my eyes as the snow helps to cool me off. I guess, I’ve been warm for so long, I didn’t realize it until I felt driven to feel the outside air. Folding my arms under my head, I look out at the trees, snow drifts, and world outside of this house.

Losing track of time, I only close the window when I realize the floor is wet from the amount of snow that’s blown in and melted. Carefully walking to the bathroom for a towel, I clean up the mess, feeling floaty.

It’s as if there’s someone in my brain closing and opening internet browsers, causing me to be unable to focus on anything for very long.

So, I simply drift from thought to thought, letting go of the ones that don’t make sense to me right now. It’s a cloud of detachment.

Deciding I’ve walked around enough, I move to my mattress and climb into the middle of it, pulling my trophies toward me from the pack that confuses me. Inhaling the scents, I bury my face in the blanket as something reminding me of a knife twists inside of me.

My pussy clamps down on nothing in anger, adding to the cramping as it slicks. I don’t know why, but my traitorous brain conjures Caelin’s face, his pale blue eyes saying that he can fix whatever hurts.

“Argh!” I cry out, biting down on the knit fabric to muffle the scream.

I don’t need help, I’m fine…

Spitting out the blanket, I pull my stolen sweatshirt off my body, dropping it next to me. I don’t want it too far away from me, my skin simply feels as if it’s on fire though. Every nerve ending feels like a live wire, making me twitch occasionally like a drug addict who is craving her next hit.

Except, my body is addicted to cum, knots, and the pheromones of my pack. These are all things I can’t have, so I need to find something that will work just as well. Opening one of the hidey holes in the cabinets by the nest, I pull out one of my new toys. It’s pre charged, and doesn’t need batteries.

My mouth salivates as I look down at the veiny, thick dildo with the knot, sad that it’s not real so I can suck on it. That’s the downside to toys, I crave the taste of cum. Still, what I’m feeling isn’t as strong as my heat last month.

I don’t know how much more it’ll ramp up, but I can manage for now, as long as I can come around a knot. Even if it’s a fake one.

Playing with the buttons so I know how to use it, I fix my pillows behind me to ensure that they’re perfectly positioned. Dropping back onto them, I widen my legs, whimpering as a large gush of slick slides out. It’s not something I can control.

These sheets are going to be ruined very quickly.

Sighing, I push the thick tip of the toy inside my channel, moaning as I turn it on. As the toy twists and turns and the piercings light up my nerve endings, my pussy continues to perfume. Keeping my trophies near me, I inhale deeply as I push the toy in, back bowing as I shudder.

“Oh God,” I groan, imagining that they’re touching me. I can play pretend as long as they’re not here. The sting of betrayal fades away, and all I feel is need.

My body craves my alphas for their thick knots, but the connection of another human being as well during a vulnerabletime. Heats are meant to be had while surrounded by people who love you, need you, adore you.

Why is fate so cruel as to give me one when I have none of that?

Pushing the toy further inside of me, my eyes roll back as it begins to roll and twist.

“Oh fuck,” I moan.

“Aisling, are you okay?” Evan asks, banging on the door.

Kill me now.I’m sure they can fucking smell me.

“Fine,” I gasp, breathing hard as my heart pounds from the shock of being essentially caught masturbating. Maybe toys aren’t for me.

“Why do you sound weird?” he asks and I whine as I pull the toy out and toss it to the side, frustrated.