Page 53 of Toxic

Those damn cramps in my stomach wouldn’t stop, the worst phase was coming, and weirdly enough, I was glad that there was someone else to help me. Skye’s energy had something thatmade everything seem a bit easier, maybe even bearable—a brief illusion of security. Just a brief moment to hold on to. Perhaps, even if for a little while, tiny bits of good could appear in my life—after Anton left?

His hands gently stroked my head and back, and it comforted me, eased my pain. And that horrible feeling growing inside me, the feeling that my life had gone off course and would never get back on track… for a moment, it just didn’t matter—disappeared.

Bad stuff seemed to pile up in my life incessantly: Anton left just half a year after my dad died. His treatment drained a huge amount of money, leaving me with almost nothing. We lived in a rented apartment and had no savings. So I was left with debts, tuition, and living expenses, which is why, already being here, I made the desperate decision to join the Kingdom of Promises—and I hated it from day one. Even though I didn’t have any alpha clients, it didn’t make the job any easier.

Every time Ed or May wanted to use my services, something twisted inside of me. I went to the meetings and tried to put on a brave face, but inside, I felt scared and empty. This wasn’t what I wanted in life; I wanted what I had when I was with Anton. Love and tenderness.

But he met that fucking omega, and I couldn’t do anything. He apologized, tears in his eyes, yet it was stronger than him. Something inside me died that day—maybe forever.

I knew I was unable to trust anyone, especially not alphas and omegas because they were caught up in that damn mating game, always sniffing for a better mate, consciously or not.

Sooner or later, each of them might meet their higher mate.

And betas?

The statistics were merciless: almost no alpha/beta (or beta/omega) relationships and marriages lasted more than ten years; it just DIDN'T work. It wasn't meant to.

And I was a fool to bet everything on one card… falling madly in love with an alpha.

Tears wouldn’t stop streaming down my face. Skye raised his hand and gently wiped them away, which only made me angrier because that gesture wasn’t meant for me.

I couldn’t claim it as mine.

Skye and I had no future together. There was only this moment of pure, untainted human compassion, and nothing more would come of it.

But that's exactly why I shut out all thoughts of the future and immersed myself in this moment, in this fleeting illusion, in this brief freeze-frame.

"I need to finish a piece of code I was supposed to deliver today," I mumbled because that thought was nagging at the back of my mind.

"What?" Skye lifted his head.

"You know I work part-time for DevApp now. I have assignments from them, and I have to deliver every day."

His eyes widened. "You must be kidding. You can’t work right now!"

"But I have to. I’ve got a really good track record with my assignments. I can’t let them down—they promised me a full-time job after graduation."

"No way. Give me the code, I’ll write it for you."

"You’re crazy. You don’t even know what we’re working on…"

"Is it in Python, JavaScript, or C++?"

"JavaScript."

"I’m good at that. Better than with Python, trust me. I work in JavaScript and C++ for Nathaniel’s startup. You can guide me, but you’re not programming in your condition, for sure!"

"Why would you even do that?"

"Why did you help me with my essay?"

I didn’t answer.

He nodded and said, "Then for the same reason you did it for me, I’ll do it now."

Seeing his determined (and distractingly handsome!) face, I pressed my lips together. Unreal. Not only was he incredibly good-looking, but also… kind. Sighing, I pointed to my laptop.

Skye got up and brought it over to the bed.

---