Page 44 of Toxic

"Alright, let’s go through all these problems, and I’ll show you some techniques to help you optimize your code. Looks like you’ve got a bit of trouble with that. For homework, I’d suggest diving into time complexity (O(n)) and practicing with tools like timeit or cProfile to measure code performance."

He nodded eagerly.

"Basic debugging with print statements works when you’re starting out, but for more complex projects, it’s not gonna cut it. I can see you struggle with debugging code that has a lot of dependencies, async stuff, or is spread across different modules. I’d recommend getting comfortable with the Python Debugger and practicing debugging asynchronous functions."

Skye stared at me with this intensity, like he was hanging on every word. It was kinda nice how closely he was paying attention.

We spent the next 15 minutes going over his exam, breaking down the problems. I gave him a few exercises, and we worked through them together as he made corrections. I was trying hard not to stare at him, but my eyes kept drifting his way. Skye had this super expressive face; you could see every emotion while he programmed—the hesitation, the thinking, and the moments when he finally got it. I watched as he furrowed his brows a little, bit his lower lip, and lightly rubbed his chin, so focused, so determined to get it right, completely unaware that I was checking out his ridiculously handsome, masculine face.

His lips were really well-shaped, like they were sensitive to the touch. I’d felt them on my body more than once… Maybe when this lesson was over, I could feel them again? That thought sent a wave of unwanted excitement through me.

I couldn’t understand why he had such a strong effect on me, why he stirred up this intense hunger… for closeness? Even with Anton, I never felt this kind of chemistry, and I always thought we were a good match. But this? This was something else, otherworldly.

No, just no. I couldn’t let myself fall into that trap. Fuck, if he knew what I was thinking, he’d probably think I was a desperate slut. And besides, there was no future for us. The stats were brutal—relationships between alphas and betas had only a 1-2% success rate. All it took was for them to catch the scent of an omega with a higher mateship, and it was over. Sure, Anton resisted a few times when he met his Half Mates, but he was just delaying the inevitable. Eventually, a better mate always came along. That’s exactly how he found his High Mate. He came to me with tears in his eyes, fell to his knees, and begged forforgiveness. And me? That’s when I realized I’d made a critical mistake.

I should never have gotten emotionally involved with an alpha. There’s no way a bond like that could survive, and all it would lead to was another heartbreak. I was this kind of person for whom a relationship meant ‘all or nothing.’ If I let myself fall for Skye, it’d be so much harder to say ‘no’ to whatever this was.

When I closed my eyes, I could still see the images from those first few days after Anton broke up with me. It was hell on earth—razor blades cutting my wrists, gallons of alcohol, vomiting, obsessive thoughts about ending it all, repeating for months. Everything fell apart, and I never really put myself back together. If it wasn’t for Liam, I wouldn’t even be here.

But even with his support, I still did risky things. At my old college, seeing Anton every day with his new guy was killing me. It lasted for the last three months of my sophomore year. I drank, did drugs, and got a sketchy tattoo at a cheap parlor where I seriously doubted they sanitize their tools. I pierced my ears, lip, eyebrow, and nose—myself! No needle, just shoving earrings through my skin. It hurt like hell, but I weirdly enjoyed punishing myself. It was a messed-up time. If Liam hadn’t come to check on me every day, I don’t know what would’ve happened. I couldn’t go through that again. Never. I needed to protect myself.

It all only started to get better when I transferred to this college at the beginning of senior year and threw myself into keeping my grades up. It helped me refocus.

So there I was, sitting next to Skye as he typed out another line of code, fists clenched so tight they hurt, fighting the urge to run my hand along his forearm, where those beautiful veins stood out. Fighting the need to touch the warm skin of a young, vibrant, horny alpha, to inhale that intoxicating mix of pine and lime, fresh and overwhelming…

The strength of alphas, that spark of life they ignite in fertile bodies, their life force, more potent than any beta’s, like an unstoppable river—I wanted to drown in it.

At some point during my chaotic thoughts, I noticed faint freckles on Skye’s pale forearm. Like someone had sprinkled tiny sunspots on him. It took everything in me not to reach out and feel the electric energy that seemed to pulse between us.

He could’ve revived me with that spark, lit up my burned-out beta body, given me that life I couldn’t sustain on my own. For a moment, I would matter. As much as his hands allowed me to, it’d be an illusion of being valued, desired… and then it would fade away. Inevitably.

Fuck, Soren, slow down.

And once again, I was fighting to shut down my spiraling thoughts. With every minute that brought us closer to the end of this lesson, my mind focused more and more on the image of his mouth wrapped around the head of my dick. Skye really gave it his all as he sucked me off with so much passion and enthusiasm. I could feel how much he enjoyed it and that made it even better, more satisfying.

Seeing a big, strong alpha kneeling in front of me, for me… the feeling of my dick sliding down his throat, left me breathless.

Skye looked up at me, his turquoise eyes locking onto mine.

"Soren, it’s really hard to concentrate when I can smell your slick all the time."

Fuck, I cursed under my breath and quickly got up.

"You alphas and your annoyingly good sense of smell. It’s like you’ve got unfair insight into someone’s private stuff. I bet you can hear my heartbeat, too, right?" I muttered sourly.

Skye chuckled softly.

"Yeah, ever since I first approached you to introduce myself, I could hear your heart race when I stood close to you."

"Asshole! No wonder society considers it rude to talk about stuff like that."

"What can I say? You brought it up."

I tilted my head, teasing. "Bet you’re the kind of alpha who makes obnoxious remarks about his boyfriends’ nests."

Skye laughed even harder and rubbed his face.

"You got me. My family always said it was off-limits to comment on nests unless the alpha was really close to the omega. But I never gave a shit. I’ve commented on omegas’ nests plenty of times. The whole taboo around it just seems weird to me."

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