Page 37 of Toxic

He winced angrily. "I don't want your fucking money!"

He tried to free himself, but I didn't let him, feeling he was shaking slightly.

"Soren, it's… I know you need it, for the medical debts."

He snorted, his face angry and red. "I don't owe you any explanation! But if you want to know, I work more for DevApp. Half-time now, not one-third like before. I can pay the debts!"

"But—"

"Let me go!" He jerked his arm from my grasp and rushed away, so quickly I gave up on trying to catch him.

What just happened?

What did it mean? For… us?

For a while, I just stood there with my mouth hanging open, absolutely clueless as to how to interpret Soren's behavior. So… he didn’t want to meet with me again? Or just not… for money?

Feeling a bit stressed, I went into the dorm, heading toward our room.

Archer was at the gym, and Alvin was napping.

I needed to finish my essay, so I did, feeling a bit unfocused, and sent an email to Soren:

"Hey, Soren, I hope we’re good. I attached my essay to the email. If you want, you can check it, but if you changed your mind, it’s okay too."

One hour later, I got a message from him with an attachment.

Soren wrote: "I made some edits, but overall, it was a really strong piece of writing. You probably don’t give yourself enough credit."

That was it. Not a word about whether we were ‘good’ now.

I opened the file and read the essay. He hadn’t changed much, but his tweaks were in the right places, significantly improving the overall structure. I felt strangely touched and grateful because he didn’t have to do that—we weren’t even friends. It was really… sweet of him?

***

The next day, I waited for him outside the dorm, biting my nails. How was he gonna behave? Was he done with me? Or was this the start of something new between us?

When he came out, he seemed surprised to see me there. I offered him my warmest smile, but he just gave a slight grimace in return and immediately pulled out a cigarette.

"I wanted to thank you for the essay edits. It’s really better now," I said quickly as he took a deep drag. I wanted to steer the conversation toward that, just in case he was about to start some ‘we shouldn’t meet anymore’ kind of talk.

He shrugged slightly, blowing smoke right in my face, like he obviously enjoyed doing. "It was no big deal, just a few corrections here and there. Nothing to discuss."

"Still, thank you very much," I whispered, stepping closer. Soren quickly brought the cigarette to his lips and took another drag, as if the smoke was his shield. His gray eyes were fixed on my face, seemingly indifferent.

I waited, unsure of what he would say next, but he… just didn’t say anything, as if last night hadn’t even happened. Like nothing strange was going on between us, like some… uncharted territory wasn't unfolding.

So we stood there for a moment, just like that, in a pleasant silence, close to each other. There was something… exciting about it. For the thousandth time, I glanced at his lips—pink and full. I wanted to taste them, but… it wasn’t possible.

"What?" he murmured quietly, but to my surprise, he didn’t look away this time.

He blew a smoke ring into the air above us. There was something almost… intimate about it. Slowly, I raised my hand and placed it on his slim hip. He didn’t push me away, but kept smoking as my fingers gently slipped under his hoodie and brushed against his smooth naked skin. He exhaled and closed his eyes. My heart raced, and so did his…

Super slowly, I leaned down, and my nose hovered just above his neck. For a moment, I let it linger there, the tip of it skimming his skin. Soren allowed it! He even slightly tilted his head back, and we were standing in this weird constellation—me kinda sniffing his neck, and him with half-lidded eyes, taking deep drags.

We were having this strange moment of intimacy—kinda unexplainable.

Then I felt the first drops of rain on my face.

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