Page 32 of Twister

With the impact of his words, her heart tightened—in joy, but with tendrils of fear around the edges. Taking care of people had defined her, and she had only recently slipped thatnoose. For the first time in her life, she knew in her heart why her relationship with Dylan had ended. It wasn’t just his unreasonable demands, but unlike Twister, who was strong, even now as he stood against her, trying with all his might to hold his own, Dylan was weak both in character and mind. He let David play on him until he’d wedged himself between them. She wouldn’t be surprised if it had been David who suggested to Dylan that he lock her down.

But this was unfair. Twister wasn’t Dylan, nor David, not by a huge margin. He was a warrior who was a little lost, and he needed her. She wanted to be there for him, unable to describe how enmeshed they were now.

He kissed her cheek again, just the softest brush of his lips over her skin. She recognized the humble, vulnerable need in him, and she cupped the back of his head.

“I’m sorry,” he rasped, his voice sounding like rough sandpaper. “I’m so fucking sorry.”

It wasn’t her he was talking to, and Sadie knew it. She knew the words were for himself.

“So sorry,” he repeated, and then a racking shudder went through him, and another. A sob broke free from deep in his chest, an agonized sound Sadie felt all the way down in her gut, and she clasped him to her, giving whatever comfort her embrace could.

“Just breathe, babe. I’ve got you.”

Easing his hold on her, Twister fingered her wet hair. “I’m sorry,” he said, this time for her sake. Then he started talking about his family, his dad and how it had been for him growing up. As he spoke, she found that tight knot of fear loosening inside her. He might as well be describing her life. He even had twin sisters he helped raise, and everything she thought about him twisted on a dime, and she realized how much they had in common…everything. “I’m really sorry about?—”

“No, no need.” She interrupted him tenderly. “You’re going through something profound, and there’s no shame in expressing yourself any way you feel is appropriate. Can you talk about it?”

“No time right now,” he said. “My team saved me.” She could see the effect that telling her had on him. And his eyes—oh, God, his eyes. Refusing to give in to the feelings churning inside her, she freed her arms, then took his face between her hands, wanting him to look at her. “I’m so very thankful they did.”

For the first time in a while, she caught a tiny glimmer of humor in his eyes. “Is this about the sex?”

She caught her bottom lip in her teeth, then said, “Maybe,” with a little giggle.

He took a hard breath and smiled softly. “You do know how to distract a guy. Let me say that.”

“I did all right, but it was you whoroseto the occasion.”

“Aw,” he said on a groan, then he kissed her with a chuckle.

With the tension broken, she understood that wasn’t all there was to it. She had her own demons and issues to face, to understand, and now there was this beautiful, sexy, wounded man in the mix, one she wanted to comfort and get to know even better.

11

After his breakdown,all these emotions and feelings were new to him, and he was struggling to understand how being with Sadie was changing him. He never even entertained the fact that he would pull away from her, thinking that he needed space. He’d had space, and it hadn’t helped to alleviate the way he was feeling ever since the first panic attack.

He buttoned the last button on his white shirt, grabbing his earpiece out of the case and tucking it inside his ear canal.

She was suddenly there, the tank top and very short Navy khaki shorts covering up that delectable body, her multicolored hair braided and still damp, but small dry wisps framed her fresh face, devoid of any makeup.

She covered his hands, her soft touch feeding and soothing him all at once, and he had to admit that he was embarrassed, a tad angry, and confused by his outburst. Leave it to Sadie to comfort him and bring it out into the open. “I hope you don’t think I’m a wuss,” he growled, feeling more heat suffuse his face. His tone had a brittle edge to it. He hadn’t felt like this in a long time, not since he had been reamed out by his father for trying to get out of going to the soup kitchen so he could play somebasketball. The mortification had been excruciating, and he was haunted by the pain of recollection.

She took a soft, almost hitching breath. “I’ve just reveled in two intense, sexually charged, satisfying experiences with you, seeing your powerful body and overwhelmed by your sheer, unadulterated masculinity. So, wuss? No. Someone trying to understand and find his way in a morass of confusing emotions that he has every right to feel at any time without judgment? Oh, yes,” she said with quiet conviction.

He closed his eyes, her compassion washing through him like a warm, hard hug, touching on uncomfortable, negative feelings, anguish, resentment, and, yes, pain. A lot of pain. How did this happen? How had he found her when he needed her the most? And she was so goddamned giving. “Fuck, Sadie,” he said softly, not sure how to react, genuinely afraid of leaning into this anymore, feeling the seductive pull of her generosity and understanding, nothing manipulative or held back. He didn’t want to need this…but he did, and not only that, he wanted more of it. He just felt so clueless about how to get what he needed.

Him. A man who never backed down from anything, had energy to spare when even a thirty-two-mile swim was a simple exercise. He was tough physically and mentally. He had to be…but all the time? He was suddenly exhausted from holding all those barriers in place.

She cupped his jaw, lifting his head so she could meet his eyes, a quiet urgency in her voice. “Something tells me you don’t do that often, if at all…big, tough guy, and you don’t have anyone you feel secure with to let go like that.”

He stared at her rigidly for a moment at the way she did that so effortlessly, pegged him like a pro. His jaw tightened, sending waves of pain shooting into his temples, then she caressed him until he relaxed his teeth. “No. There’s been no jumping-off point in my life.” The words came out with a bone-tiredweariness. He dropped his head, the look in her eyes making his chest tight all over again.

She stepped closer, her hand slipping around to his nape. “It royally sucks to keep it all inside or to release it all alone. There’s nothing but pain there and a loneliness that only compounds any kind of strong emotion. I have felt the tension in your body from the moment your head landed on my shoulder.” His chin came up, a soft smile smudging her mouth. She squeezed his hand and the back of his neck. “Letting go, releasing things, then regrouping is always best.”

“This is a stretch for me. I don’t analyze anything. I have to keep myself in a strong place.”

“I know you think you do,” she whispered roughly as her hand settled over his heart. “I know it from my own experience.” He hauled in a deep, shaky breath, keeping his gaze on hers, catching that torment in her eyes as she continued. “But you don’t have to shun everything to get to that place. I say that embracing all there is inside you gets you to an even stronger place.”

He turned away, feeling overcrowded, confused, and angry again. “I’ve never felt this helpless in my life, and I’m struggling, Sadie. No one but you knows that. I don’t know how I would handle it if Tex or any of the guys find out what’s going on with me.” He felt almost sick with the need to hide it from his teammates.

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