Page 1 of Where You Are

Prologue

December 2019

Melanie

I’m jolted awake as the wheels beneath me touch down on the tarmac. Exhausted, I blink my bleary eyes and try to brace myself as the plane goes barreling forward along the runway before slowly coming to a jerky stop. As we taxi, I continue trying to familiarize myself with my surroundings, like the narrow seat that I’m cramped into that the stewardess didn’t tell me to return to its upright position, most likely because it only reclines an inch and a half and isn’t noticeable either way.

My neck is stiff and it hurts like hell to move it even the slightest bit. I have to move it about a centimeter at a time before I can get full range of motion. When we reach the gate, the engine is cut and the air gets stuffy as people get out of their seats and crowd the aisle to retrieve their belongings from the overhead compartments.

After grabbing my one large suitcase from the carousel at baggage claim, I step out onto the curb in the cold December Michigan night.

I spend the next thirty minutes in the back of an Uber, nodding and trying to politely send a message to the driver that I’m not in the mood for small talk with strangers by staring out the window and watching every little splat of sleet hitting the glass. Finally, the car pulls up to the house that I that I needed to come to first, which is my brother Jack’s.

I’m not so clueless and self-absorbed to the point that I think I will be greeted with smiles and hugs this time. I know I’m going to have to face each family member and experience their hurt and disappointment in me. And I need to start here with Jack; actually, with his wife Mayzie.

After being buzzed in through the driveway gate, we drive up to the front of the house where I get out and pull my suitcase from the trunk, dragging it behind me up the walkway to where Mayzie waits for me in the doorway. Under the cozy light of the porch stands the sister-in-law that I only spent one summer getting to know a couple of years ago. And even then, that wasn’t much time because I was, well… distracted.

As I get closer and see the look of concern and disbelief on her face, I start to lose my grip on my nerve.

After an awkward yet comforting hug, she takes me inside and makes me some tea. She’s curious of course but doesn’t press me for too much information about why I’m back, nor why I left again in the first place. My brother picked a good one. Speaking of Jack, I come to find out he’s in New York for a couple of nights, filming the Up All Night show. Over the last few years, his rock band, Turn it Up, has taken off and become a global sensation. I feel bad for missing out on most of his success. I haven’t even been to a concert. Another thing I hope to change now that I’m home… if I can handle it.

For now, his wife Mayzie has insisted I stay here in their guest room until I figure out my next move. While I’m grateful, I don’t feel the least bit deserving. When she asks about my unexpected homecoming, I tell her what I feel she needs to know, and all of a sudden I realize I have no right to be here since I’ve lost my nerve to tell her what’s truly going on. I’m not worthy of how kind she’s being, how she’s treating me like family when I feel like I’ve lost that right. I offer to go stay in a hotel but she’s not having it, and after a trans-continental flight, I’m weary and on total auto pilot. And besides, maybe I’ll feel stronger and can really talk to her in the morning, and hopefully Jack when he gets home. And then, hopefully I can start rebuilding, healing, and maybe a little at a time, earn forgiveness. I try to have hope that this is the beginning of the end of the nightmare I’ve been living the last year as I unpack a few necessities from the suitcase I’ve been living out of.

As I crawl between the sheets of the heavenly guest bed, I hold on to that little bit of hope, knowing what my mind is going to do as I drift off into unescapable slumber, which is replay the last time I came back home.

Chapter One

June, 2018

Melanie

I spotwhat I’m sure is my sister’s black Lexus SUV as it veers toward the curb in the balmy June afternoon. I feel the corner of my mouth pull up as the warm breeze blows my hair off my shoulder and I lower my head to look through the windshield to confirm that I’m right. As she puts the thing in park, she tries to give me this glare like she wants to take me over her knee, but whatever, she’s happy to see me. I’ve been gone for two years, and okay, I kind of suck at keeping in touch, but I figured family isn’t going anywhere; they’re there for each other no matter what.

Okay, that’s no excuse. I’m an ass. I try to make up for it by squeezing Sarah extra tight when she rounds the front of herlook what I can afford because I’m a doctorvehicle and steps up to my level on the curb.

“Welcome home, honey,” she says sweetly in my ear as we continue to hug it out. I smile, because her voice, if I close my eyes and block out everything else, sounds the way our mother’s did when we were little. She was my biggest reason for wanting to travel the world. More on that later.

“Thank you,” I say back sincerely, and giving her another squeeze for good measure. “It’s good to be back.” When we pull away, she opens the back hatch of her car and together we shove my suitcase in.

“So, are you ready to rejoin the real world now that you’ve had your fun?” She raises an eyebrow as she glances over at me.

“Excuse me, just because I was traveling, doesn’t mean I wasn’t working.” Every place I went, I wanted to stay at least two to four weeks to really absorb it all, which isn’t cheap, plus I wanted to be useful. So I found work every place I went, using both my graphic design and international relations degrees to help promote tourism in these fabulous places around the world. “You make it sound like I was just living it up around the world this whole time, but I’ll have you know I got a lot accomplished,” I start ticking points off on my fingers, “made a lot of connections, and totally broadened my scope. I can most likely do any promo graphics for anyone now.”

“Right, sorry,” she waves a sarcastic hand. “I’m sure you had your nose in your laptop and worked your ass off theentiretime,” she sticks her tongue out at me and I search around for something to throw at her, settling on the spare hair tie I have on my wrist. I get a small twinge of satisfaction when it bats her in the face before falling on her seat. She retaliates by jerking the wheel slightly to startle me.

“Okay, I had some fun,” I concede, holding my hands up in surrender.

“Of course, you did. Tell me about some of it.”

“Where do you want to hear about?”

“Just tell me something fun off your head. You know I’ll hear about every place at some point.”

“True. Okay, New Zealand was so fun.”

“Yeah? Why there?”

“I don’t know. Everywhere I went there was something fun going on. Like bungee jumping…”

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