Page 30 of Twink Heart

“What happened?”

“Nothing,” he shrugged. “The year ended, we parted ways, and I tried to forget about him. When I got a new roommate for junior year, I didn't find him attractive and I wrote it off as a weird phase brought on by hormones and youth.”

I could tell Rowan was having a hard time telling me this story. He was baring his soul to me and all I could do was laugh. What he'd been through would've turned on any sane person. It was like the start of a cheap porno.

“I'm not laughing at you,” I added, wanting to explain myself. “It's just the whole roommate thing is a funny situation.”

“Funny?”

“Yeah. Like bad porn funny.”

He grumbled, but didn't reply.

“So I take it you never explored anything after that? No thoughts about other guys?”

“None.”

“Not even your gay friend?”

Rowan lifted an eyebrow. “Adam? Never.”

“Not even a little bit?”

“He's handsome,” he sighed. “But we're just friends. I don't feel any sort of physical attraction to him.”

“Not your type?”

“Yeah. He's fun to be around, but not for days at a time.”

I paused for a moment. “So what made you attracted to me after all these years? What did I do to get you so worked up and confused?”

I wasn't sure if it was a totally relevant question and I knew it was one Rowan didn't want to answer. But my curiosity was burning me up, and I had to know. What could make a mostly straight man suddenly forget his preferences?

“I don't know,” he said softly. “Maybe it's the fact I'm single now or maybe it's because I'm so desperate not to feel bad that I'll take anything.” He looked up at me, his cheeks blushing. “There's something about you I can't quite put my finger on. But… I don't know… I feel like I have to give it a chance. Like I don't have a choice in the matter.”

Now it was my turn to get all worked up. I fought back the surge of emotion that wanted to bring me to tears. It was incredible how quickly this grumpy dickhead had grown on me. Last week I could've walked away easily but now I felt the same as he did. I couldn't leave and not just because I was trapped in the tub.

“That might be the sweetest thing anyone has ever said to me.” I leaned forward in the tub, wrapping my arms around Rowan’s neck. “You don’t have anything to be afraid of with me, alright? If you want to just explore who you are, that’s fine with me. I’ll be your safe place if that’s what you need.”

?“Why?” he asked, his voice shaking. “Why would you do that for me after I was such an asshole to you?”

?“Because,” I replied. “There’s something about you I like too and I can’t quite put my finger on it. You’re grumpy as hell, you’re hurt, and I just can’t stand to see cute guys brought so low.”

?“Aren’t you the one that’s tired of always being the one that gets left behind?” he offered, giving me a way out. “That’s what all those other guys did to you.”

?“This is on my terms,” I nodded, giving him a squeeze. “I don’t know you well enough to know if something could work out between us or if that’s what you even want. But I know I’ll regret not giving it a shot. So I’m happy to be your summer rebound if that’s what you need.”

?Rowan shook his head. “I don’t understand you.”

?I smiled back at him. “Then learn.” I leaned closer, pushing my forehead to his. “Now will you please kiss me already?”

?He hesitated for a moment, but then that grin began to pull at the corners of his mouth once more. “I’ve never done that before…” He paused, his gaze dropping to my lips. “Show me.”

?My smile widened. “I’d be happy to.”

?There was still some hesitation as he glanced at my lips, then back up. Finally, after taking a deep breath, he leaned forward. I closed my eyes as he pressed his lips to mine, a shot of electricity streaking through me like lightning. My skin broke out in goosebumps and I couldn’t help but lean into him. His tongue pressed against my lips and I let him in without a second thought.

?The whole world stopped spinning as time stood still. At that moment I knew my summer was going to be anything but normal. Rowan was something special and making him smile became my only goal.

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