Page 14 of Twink Heart

“I mean, being smacked around isn't the worst.” I felt the heat flush to my cheeks. “That was probably TMI…”

“It's fine,” he sighed. “My girlfriend was into that shit too.” He suddenly froze up. “Uh… ex girlfriend I mean.”

That's what was going on! At last he gave me some sort of clue as to why he was such a grump all the time. But I contained my excitement at this new revelation. I didn't want him to think I was enjoying his pain. On the contrary, I wished I could take it away.

“Can I ask what happened?” I paused for a moment. “You said was… did she die?”

“No,” he grumbled. “Although that might've made things easier. At least I could've pretended she still liked me instead of seeing her getting railed by another dude in our bed.”

“Oh wow…” This was something I couldn't find a silver lining in. Not this time. “I'm sorry that happened to you.”

“Eh, whatever,” he scoffed. “It doesn't matter, anyway.”

“It sounds like it matters a lot.”

Rowan glanced over at me, the sadness in his eyes plain to see. But there was something else there too, a look that begged me to change the subject. I had a feeling he's never wanted to talk about his ex girlfriend to begin with. It must have just slipped out.

“We can talk about my love life if you prefer,” I offered. “It's pretty bad too.”

“You get cheated on too?”

“No. But I'm pretty sure my literal ass is cursed.”

He lifted an eyebrow.

“Every time I let a man take me to bed, he never comes back.” I couldn't help a pitiful laugh. “I must be really bad in bed.”

I saw that attempted grin again. At least that cheered in up a little. I plopped down in the sand beside him, stretching out and leaning back on my elbows. I pushed the bag between us and pulled it open.

“I brought water and snacks,” I smiled. “Help yourself.”

“You think of everything.”

“I do what I can.”

I grabbed a water bottle and downed half of it before dropping it back in the bag. When I leaned back, I noticed my shift had ridden up and my shorts were pulled tight over my junk. Rowan’s eyes were already glued to the patch of skin just above my waistband and I did nothing to remove his temptation. After all, I kind of liked the attention. And now that I knew he was single, I was feeling a bit flirty. Considering how depressed he was, it might not have been the most ethical choice, but at least the eye candy would help him feel better, right? If that wasn't philanthropy, I didn't know what was.

“This is my favorite place in all of town,” I said, staring out at the horizon as the sun sank lower. “The sunsets here are the most beautiful thing I've ever seen.” I glanced up, giving him a wink. “Present company excluded of course.”

“Right,” he said, clearly not believing me. “I'm sure a thirty something with emotional baggage really drives you crazy.”

I gave him a light shove. “You should be kinder to yourself. You're extremely handsome.”

“I don't know about that…”

Was this straight man fishing for compliments? I wasn't sure. But he didn't seem uncomfortable, so I wasn't going to stop.

“I'm serious! Those brown eyes and that messy blond hair. You must have everyone drooling over you.”

“Not as much as you might think.” His gaze flicked in my direction before going back to the sand. “I'm sure you can have any guy you want.”

“Yeah,” I nodded. “But not because they like me or care about me. I'm just a fantasy to them.”

“A fantasy?”

“Yep.” I could see his confusion. “I'm a twink to guys and nothing more. Just another square on their gay bingo card.”

“Adam has said that word before,” he replied. “I never understood it though.”