Page 102 of One More Chapter

“That went well,” he says. Short, sweet, all wrapped up with the nice neat bow of his pleased smile.

“Well?! Dude, he just told us the sun was shining out of our asses! He…”

I can’t find words.

“Fully supports the great work that you’re doing and wants to see more of it,” Nate supplies for me.

“It’s not just me. I couldn’t have done this without you and Lucy.”

“You couldn’t have implemented it without my approval and Lucy’s and Phyllis’s follow-through on the guidance end.Wecouldn’t have been surviving this year behaviorally with our heads above water without what you brought us. Thankyou, Anthony.”

I settle into the chair opposite his desk and exhale, like I’m coming off of a sugar high.

“Are you going to take the job at the end of the year? You’d do well to listen. I’ll echo what Mark said: We would highly benefit from you in this position. Hell, I’d go so far as to say that, within five years, you could be a behavior coordinator within the district.”

I shake my head, exhaling at the thought offive yearswhen I’m still trying to wrap my brain around the last fiveminutes.

“I don’t know.” Running my hands through my hair, I sigh. “I mean, are you even planning on taking the principal job full time? I thought you were dead set on going back to the classroom.”

Nate gets a wistful look in his eye. I remember sitting with the guys at the bar after getting back from the coaching conference and realizing we all worked in the same district. They were barely my friends back then, but Nathan had his eyes on returning to the classroom before the shit storm of this year hit. There’s a strange peace settling over him that makes me predict his next words.

“Switching to an administrative role was once a financial obligation instead of a choice. Once I stopped seeing my job as anobligation, I actually started to enjoy myself. In this role, I’m able to helpteachers, and help the school as a whole. Sure, it was a step outside my comfort zone, but after Claire swept into my life, I’ve realized that sometimes, we have to take the first step to realize that the leap itself isn’t as scary as we once thought it was.”

I picture Penelope, her windswept fire engine hair blowing in the gentle breeze when she’d run down to the water’s edge, stuck her toes in, and flicked the water up at me with a smile that rivaled the starlight. I think of all the little ways she and I have been stepping outside our fears and our what-ifs, and how easy it is once we actually get over them and see whatispossible, instead of getting caught up with what we’re imagining inside our heads.

“You’re going to take it, aren’t you?” I ask, already knowing the answer. Nathan nods, still staring out into the open space in his office. I know exactly who he’s thinking of.

“At least for right now, I believe I am where I’m supposed to be. I can always return to the classroom after I retire for something to do with my time.”

We share a quiet laugh at the prospect of retirement, but I know we’re both inside our own minds thinking of ournow. His with Claire. Mine with Penelope.

She needs to feel stable in order to make a change—to leave behind her teaching career and step into her role as a full-time author. If I had the means to be that foundation for her so that she could step fully onto the writing platform, I’d do it in a heartbeat.

I don’t say it in as many words. There’s still a lot of school year to get through before I make my decision. But I think Nate can tell, especially when our wistful gazes start looking the same. Because even as my mind starts to make up all of the ways that this could go wrong, it can’t be so bad if I have Penelope beside me to help me stand back up again.

thirty-nine

penelope

“You havegotto be kidding me.”

I wonder if Amanda White knows that she might make more friends if she ever had a positive thing to say?

Anthony and Nathan are fielding a wide array of emotions at our monthly staff meeting. My heart sinks to my stomach when his face falls, all of the confidence that he’d entered with about the behavior program sliding off his shoulders.

“You’re telling me that, on top of all of my lesson planning, grading, and dealing with the bullshit of the day to day, I’m supposed to stop and logallof the behaviors? When am I supposed to find the time?” another disgruntled senior staff member calls from the back.

“I’ve been doing it since September. On top ofmostof our lesson planning and grading. It takes less than five minutes,” Sam digs in, crossing his arms. I see Ant’s color climb a little higher with support from his friend.

“What if I justdon’t?” comes from a Meadow Ridge teacher.

Ant swallows, and his gaze ticks over to mine. I lift my brows and toss him a small smile and thumbs up from the edge of the table, and he nods.

“We’re riding on a double-edged sword here, folks. If you take a few minutes to document behaviors that are concerning or repetitive, the right people will be able to manage them. If you choose not to, the behaviors will continue, and when you come down to the office asking for help from myself or Anthony, we’re going to ask you where you documented the behaviors, and what you’ve been doing in the meantime to support the student. We can’t help you if you don’t know how often, when, where, et cetera these behaviors are occurring.”

Chaos erupts. Small groups of people are shaking their heads and whispering—some, on the other hand, are very loudly voicing their displeasure. But also? A lot of people are in support of Ant, Nathan, and Lucy. Alot.

“We’ve needed something like this for years,” Hank says, leaning over to me.

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