Page 154 of Between the Lines

It’s all so confusing. Love. I want him to wallow, but I also want to be the one who helps him pick up the pieces and reassemble them.

Right now though, I want to eat my weight in ice cream and watch romcoms with my friends—and okay,maybeI want to hear about how Nathan defended me in front of the entire staff to that slimeball Joe Petersen—while they do each other’s nails.

I won’t let them touch mine. I’m still too raw for that. And besides, I figure if I hold on to Nathan’s last manicure until the last of the polish picks off, I should be over him by then, right?

Right?

It’sthisthat makes the tears come this time. They’ve waned in the last few days, but as I glance down at my nails and realize howlittle paint I have left, I’m about to break down in the middle of the frozen food section.

As if on cue, my phone rings.

Mom?

She hasn’t talked to me since Christmas. Zoey has kept me updated about missing school lunches and missed appointments, but otherwise, Mom hasn’t tried to contact me either. I let it go to voicemail, but she calls again. When I don’t answer on the third ring, a text comes through, and my heart stops.

Mom

Zoey is missing. Is she with you?

I abandon the cart in the middle of the aisle, call Penelope and tell her I’m leaving, and head straight to the parking lot, keys already in hand.

My sister doesn’t pick up any of the three times I call her, and as I’m about to call a fourth time, I get a text.

Nathan

Zoey is at my house. It seems like she has run away without notifying your parents. She is safe. Would you like me to bring her to you?

In the front seat of my car, I take the deepest breath, in and out, before facing all of my darkest fears at once.

I didn’t think I’d be back here so soon. Knowing that Zoey is inside safe and sound is the only thing rooting me to the front porch without actually knocking. But suddenly, it opens.

Nathan looksragged. Worse, somehow, than when I’d held himon the couch while he sliced a knife through his own heart and gutted it between us. My heart controls my hand as it moves to reach for his face. My brain yanks it back, because she is still pissed.

He swallows, his big eyes blinking beneath his glasses as he gives me a once over, like it’s been years since he’s seen me, and not weeks.

“Zoey’s phone died, so it’s sitting in the kitchen on the charger. She is in the living room playing chess.”

I nod, only stepping past him when he has given me enough space so that our bodies don’t have to touch.

I rest my shoes in the spot beside his, the same spot I’ve used for the past several months. I hate how my heart rebels, how it sings joyful melodies as if we’re finally back where we belong. Instead, I head right for my sister. I wrap her into a soul crushing hug, holding her tightly to me before I ream into her.

“You scared the shit out of us,” I say to the top of her head.

“Language,Claire. Can you let go? I was just about to hand him his ass and you threw off my groove.”

Slowly, I release my sister. She’s wearing a scowl at the fact that I interrupted her chess game, but also? There’s a deep-seated anger there, one I’m certain caused her to flee from my parents’ house. I sigh, run my hand along her springy brown curls, and kiss her forehead.

“I’ll go call Mom and let her know you’re safe.”

At the mention of our mother, that hurt and anger laces over her gaze.

I take the call in the kitchen, and as I’m on my way back, Nathan intercepts me.

Holding my blue mug.

Steaming with the tea that always calms me down.

I don’t hesitate to take it, and my brain scolds me heavily.

---