Page 15 of Puck and Run

“I understood in the beginning, but it’s been over a month and you’ve never given me an actual reason why you’re afraid to tell Ryan. I don’t think he will care as long as you’re happy. He loves you. I think you want to keep us a secret because you don’t trust in what we have and you don’t want people to know when it ends.”

She gasps and I know I’ve found the real truth. She doesn’t trust in me or us.

Tilly shakes her head, tears spilling down her cheeks. “You’re just going to walk away.”

“I have to,” I say, feeling like I’m breaking into a million pieces.

The silence stretches between us, thick and suffocating. I can feel the regret seeping in, but I know that I will regret it more if I let this continue for one more day.

“I didn’t want to hurt you,” she whispers, her voice cracking.

“I know, princess,” I say, my throat tight. “But I can’t keep doing this. I’ll be here when you’re ready, but I need to step back until you decide what you want.”

As I turn away, the sound of the bar fades behind me. I can’t look back, it would break me. I step into the night, the chill wrapping around me like a cloak, a perfect companion to the ice forming around my heart.

Chapter Ten

Tilly

The smell of freshly baked cookies fills Ryan and Paisley’s house, but it does nothing to lift the heaviness in my heart. I sit on the couch, knees pulled to my chest, staring blankly at the wall. It’s been a week since Duke told me we needed a break and the ache of it hasn’t subsided. I feel broken like a part of me is missing.

“Hey, you want some cookies?” Paisley’s voice pulls me from my thoughts. She walks in, a plate piled high with warm chocolate chip cookies. Her smile is bright, but I can see the concern etched in her features.

“No, thanks,” I reply, my voice barely above a whisper.

She sets the plate down on the coffee table and sits across from me. “You’ve barely eaten anything for the last week. Talk to me.”

“I just…I can’t stop thinking about Duke.”

Paisley’s expression softens, and she leans in closer. “Why were you so determined to keep it a secret?”

I shrug, feeling the tears welling up again. “I don’t know. Maybe I didn’t trust it. I didn’t trust us. When it didn’t work I didn’t, I didn’t want Duke’s relationship with Ryan to be damaged.”

“Why didn’t you trust your relationship?” she presses gently.

I swallow hard, the truth spilling out, “I’ve never seen a long-term relationship work out in my family. Not a single one. The odds just weren’t in our favor.”

Paisley nods, understanding washing over her. “But you and Duke have something special, don’t you? You can’t let fear keep you from being happy.”

“I thought I was protecting myself,” I admit. “But now it feels like I only made things worse.”

Just then, the front door swings open, and Ryan walks in, his energy filling the room. “Hey, ladies, you won’t believe how bad practice was today. Coach called Duke off the ice. I don’t think I’ve ever seen that happen.” He kicks off his shoes and heads toward us.

I freeze at the mention of Duke’s name, my heart racing.

“Hey, Ry,” Paisley says, glancing at me with concern. “Maybe tone it down a bit?”

Ryan looks from her to me, his smile faltering. “What’s wrong, Tilly?”

The tears spill over and I can’t hold back. “I messed up, Ryan. I kept Duke a secret and now he doesn’t want me anymore.”

Ryan’s expression shifts, confusion turning to concern. “What do you mean a secret? Have you and Duke been seeing each other?”

I nod, fresh tears streaming down my face. “It all started at that masked party at Halloween. We, um, hit it off. Then things just kept going. We were together and I didn’t want to tell you because I thought it would be easier.”

“You thought hiding it would be easier?” Ryan asks incredulously. “Tilly, that’s ridiculous.”

“I know!” I sob, my heart breaking all over again. “But it felt safer. I didn’t want to risk losing you or making things complicated. Duke was always so understanding, but I could tell he wanted to be honest. And now he’s done with me.”

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