Page 94 of Quiet Longing

I was still trying to find the right words as we emerged from my car, and Charli asked, “Why do you always meet me out in the parking lot?”

I ran a hand over the stubble on my jaw as I turned to her, conflicted. It was only fair I tell Charli the truth, though. On instinct, I motioned for her to follow me to a quiet spot around the side of the house where we could talk. If we went inside, there would be too many people listening in. Charli leaned back against the wall while I shoved my hands in my pockets.

“It’s Steph,” I answered at last. “I didn’t want her to see us together.”

She visibly stiffened. “Why not?”

“Honestly? When we were together, Steph could be a little mean to female members of staff at the hotel if I spoke to them and she thought they liked me.”

“So, she was possessive?”

“Very. And she doesn’t have any cause to be now that we aren’t together anymore, but I know how important it is for you to fit in at work. You’re also going to encounter Steph a lot since you work with Maeve. I didn’t want her getting the wrong idea about you.”

“I see.”

“Do you?”

Charli’s gaze was trained on the ground. “She might be upset at the thought of you spending time with another woman so soon after the breakup. It’s understandable. I’d probably feel the same.”

“Right, but not just any woman,” I said. “You were my first, Charli. We have history.”

I watched as colour rose in her cheeks. Her throat bobbed, and she swallowed. “Does she know about us?”

“I don’t think so. Or at least, she doesn’t know you’reyou.”

She seemed surprised by this. “Didn’t you tell her about your past relationships?”

“I did, but not in detail. She wouldn’t know enough to realise who you are.”

Charli nodded, falling silent then. What I really wanted to know was why she’d left the hotel with her eyes red and tearful like she’d been crying. Seeing her like that awoke something deep and primal in me. I wanted to destroy whoever made her so upset.

“What happened?” I asked.

“Pardon?”

“When you came out of the hotel earlier, you’d obviously been crying.”

“Oh, that,” she sighed, her hazel eyes settling somewhere around my chin. “It’s silly really. I got a letter back from the revenue department, and it had my maiden name on it. I just … it released something in me. It felt good to see it, you know? They were happy tears.”

“Ah,” I said, my tension easing as understanding dawned. “Well, I’m glad I don’t have to make anyone pay for upsetting you.” Charli blinked, her long lashes fluttering, and I had to force myself not to reach out and caress her cheek. Her skin looked so soft, and my fingers itched to touch her. “So, it feels good to have your old name back?”

She exhaled a heavy breath, a hint of a smile playing on her lips. “It feels amazing, like a weight’s been lifted.”

“Was it that bad being married to him?” I knew it was a question I shouldn’t ask, but a part of me needed to know abouther ex-husband. Some of the small details she’d revealed about him concerned me. They didn’t sit well.

Charli’s gaze flickered up, meeting mine for a second before returning to chin level. “Not right away. The first two years were good. I was happy. Mostly. And then …”

“And then?”

“I guess the first warning sign was when he convinced me my relationship with my mom was toxic, that the way she’d lied to me as a child made her some sort of narcissist and that she was the reason why I was on medication for depression.”

My jaw tightened as I listened to her. I’d met Charli’s mother when she came to visit at the end of her stay that summer. The woman seemed anxious and a little uptight, but she was no narcissist. “Why were you on medication?”

Charli blew out a small breath, the air of it gently hitting my face, and I leaned closer to her on instinct. “I found my first couple of months at college challenging. It was all such a big change, and with everything I’d just discovered about my parents and my family, I went through a bit of a crisis.” My hands fisted where they hung at my sides because this was the same period when I’d been in hell over Mam getting sick. Charli had been going through her own struggle, and I couldn’t help wondering if I’d just gotten my shit together and kept in touch, maybe even gone to see her, she might not have felt so lost.

“I was very down, so Mom found a therapist who I started seeing. Talking to her really helped, and the medication kept me on an even keel. Then I met Jesse, he proposed, and I felt like my life was on track, but, well, it didn’t turn out how I thought.” She laughed joylessly, her eyes faraway.

“Did he convince you to stop talking to Nuala, too?”

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