Page 135 of Quiet Longing

“Right, my mom’s like that. She finds it rude to bring it up.”

“Let’s table the possibility that Rhys bought this house because of you. From what you’ve told me, he sounds like a very well-adjusted, intelligent, caring man who’s made a good life for himself despite a troubled childhood. Whatever his reasons for making the purchase, I’m sure they’re more reasonable than you might expect. What I really want to discuss is the fact you’re still in love with him.”

Damn, had I let that slip when I’d blurted everything out? I flushed where I sat in the plush, deep blue armchair. “Yes, I still love him,” I said. There was no point denying it.

“But you don’t feel ready, despite your progress this year, for a romantic relationship?”

“Ididn’tfeel ready, but that was back in February. Now I’m … I don’t know. Emotionally, I’m quite stable. I’m less jumpy. I don’t panic or check out when something stressful happens. I’ve been sleeping great, no nightmares or anxiety attacks. I even work out regularly at the hotel gym, which is something I’ve never done before. The exercise keeps me on an even keel emotionally. I feel good about where I’m at. I just worry that if I try to add anything more to my plate, all the progress I’ve made will begin to crumble.”

“And entering a new relationship would be the thing to cause it to crumble?”

I clasped my hands together. “Possibly.”

“I disagree.”

“Pardon?”

“It’s true that many of the people I see need to keep their lives restricted in order to maintain balance, but I don’t believe that of you. I think you’ve made incredible progress this year, Charli, but denying your heart what it very clearly wants isn’t healthy, especially since you and Rhys are very much entrenched in one another’s lives. You share a workplace, and he’s close with your relatives. Now, if I had even an inkling that Rhys was anything like your ex-husband, if I thought he could be hiding a similar nature, I would be advising you to walk away and walk away fast. But this is a man who has shown incredible maturity, understanding, patience, and love in his treatment of you. He’s not someone I would have a single concern about if you were to rekindle your relationship with him.”

Emotion rose up, clogging my throat. Anna-Marie was telling me everything my heart yearned to hear, and yet there was a fear holding me back. A fear that my stability would suffer and I’d regress, not only messing up the little life I’d built, but Rhys,’ too.

“It’s something to consider. My advice would be to take some time and decide if you see a future with another man down the line, or if, inevitably, the only future you want is with Rhys.”

Anna-Marie’s words repeated in my head for weeks after that session. Rhys had been spending a lot of time in Cork with Derek, Tristan, and Uncle Padraig. The new hotel was almost complete, and Rhys was assisting with the installation of security cameras, as well as helping hire a new security team.

It was looking like the grand opening might happen in time for Christmas.

Anyhow, I hadn’t seen a lot of him, and it only reinforced how much I missed him and how much those little glimpses of him throughout the day meant to me.

Maggie and Shay’s wedding during the first weekend of October came around fast. I hadn’t seen Rhys in almost twoweeks and felt like I was going through withdrawals all over again. As Shay’s best man, I knew he’d probably be busy during the ceremony, but I hoped maybe he’d have time to sit down and talk later.

I wasn’t going to confront him about the house, but Iwasgoing to tell him I was in love with him. And I was absolutely pissing my pants. Nuala kept asking me if I was okay as we rode a cab to the church on the north side of the city where the ceremony was being held. Supposedly, it was the same church Shay’s family had been attending for generations.

When we arrived, Nuala paid for the fare, and I insisted on paying for the next one we took to the reception venue. Dozens of well-dressed people had already gathered outside the church.

“So many great fascinators,” Nuala said enviously as she eyed the gathering. “Now I wish I’d worn one.”

“You look amazing,” I told her, admiring her pink chiffon dress. I’d gone for a forest green fit and flare design with a sweetheart neckline. My hair was in loose curls that Nuala styled for me about an hour ago. I also wore a small pair of gold hoop earrings that I kept self-consciously fiddling with. It had been years since I’d worn earrings, but like all the other progress I’d made, I was slowly adding them back into my jewellery collection. My dress, which hit just above the knees, was also a new purchase. It had been a long time since I’d confidently shown off my legs, my scarred knee fully exposed.

I refused to let my trauma steer my decisions any longer, and every time I fought past my fears and took a step forward, I always felt better for it.

My eyes scanned the attendees as we approached, and I spotted Shay’s brother, Ross, his wife, Dawn and their kids, as well as Maggie’s brother, Jonathan, who looked very dashing in a tailored suit. Then my gaze landed on Rhys standing next to a slightly anxious looking Shay, and my breath caught. Bothlooked stunningly handsome in their three-piece, dark blue suits, white shirts, and black ties.

Almost like he sensed me, Rhys’ eyes caught mine and held. I shot him a somewhat timid smile as Nuala and I approached.

“Wow, look at you all gussied up,” Nuala declared as she pulled Rhys into a hug, and he kissed her cheek. “And Shay, the man of the hour. Oof, Maggie’s one lucky lady.”

Shay grinned at Nuala, signing aThank youas Rhys stepped to my side. “It’s good to see you,” he said, a gruff rumble in his voice that told me he really meant it. Had he missed our daily encounters since being away as much as I had?

“It’s good to see you, too. I’ve missed you a lot,” I blurted, a little overwhelmed by him. He just looked so handsome, his hair freshly barbered, his eyes somehow brighter against the darker blue of his suit. It was a lot for me to take in, especially since I’d spent the last few weeks grappling with the fact I loved him and wanted to make a future with him.

If he’d have me, that was.

His gaze travelled over me, lingering on the nude heels I’d treated myself to recently. They were the most expensive shoes I’d ever purchased, and the heated look that passed over Rhys’ face told me the price was worth it. With effort, he dragged his eyes back up to mine.

“You look stunning. And I’ve missed you, too. More than you know.”

Air caught in my lungs at his quietly spoken statement, my pulse fluttering as I swiftly changed the subject. “How’s the groom doing? He looks a little nervous.”

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