Page 133 of Quiet Longing

His tone made me worry something bad had happened, and Maeve and Barry cast me curious glances as I went out to join him. Rhys waited a little way down the hall, then motioned forme to follow him to his office. Once there, he closed the door, and I took a seat by his desk.

“What is it? Is everything okay?”

He ran a hand over the faint five o’clock shadow on his jaw before his eyes found mine. “I’m not sure how to say this,” he started, and my stomach twisted, fearing bad news.

“Okay, well,” I folded my arms and braced. “Just tell me then.”

Rhys exhaled. “Jesse was found dead yesterday.”

My hands went to my face in shock as my pulse raced, and my mind tried to comprehend the news Rhys had just shared. The last few months, I’d tried to put Jesse’s arrest out of my mind and focus on myself. My independence. But I had a few weak moments where I’d asked Rhys for information. What he’d revealed hadn’t surprised me, not since Jesse was a lawyer and knew all the ways to delay going to trial, which he’d been fully utilizing. He’d also been granted bail, so he hadn’t been rotting away in a jail cell like I’d hoped, but …

“That’s, that’s—how?” I blurted, still in shock.

“They deemed it a suicide, but given the dangerous people Jesse was involved with, and how the discovery of his crimes got his clients into hot water, too, my guess is that the killing was ordered.” The way he relayed bleak information in such a matter of fact manner reminded me he’d been a soldier once and had probably had to witness and hear about such things often during that time.

I rubbed my chest, a mix of horror and relief mingling within me. Jesse was dead. The man who’d terrorised me and destroyed my confidence was no longer breathing. An emptiness followed. If I’d been asked yesterday how I’d feel to know Jesse had died, I might’ve said I’d jump for joy, but the reality was different. I wasn’t sure how to feel. Maybe I was just still in shock. Then, atear leaked down my face, and a moment later, Rhys was before me. He pulled me from the chair and wrapped me in his arms.

“I know this is a lot for you, but I’m glad the motherfucker is dead,” he said a low, gravelly voice.

“I’m glad, too. It’s just …”

“Shocking? I know. That’s to be expected.”

He held me for a while longer, letting me cry into his chest though they were mostly tears of relief. Finally, I pulled back, and Rhys handed me a tissue to wipe my eyes. “Thank you for coming and telling me.”

“Of course. I just want to make sure you’re all right.”

“I am, or at least, I will be. Now that he’s gone, maybe I can finally breathe again properly, you know?”

Rhys nodded, surveying me as though trying to decide whether it was okay to let me go, that I wouldn’t crumple to the floor without him to prop me up. Finally, he withdrew, and we stood in front of each other, an awkward tension in the air. What do you say after hearing the news your abusive ex-husband had died and had likely been killed by the criminals he’d been laundering money for?

“So,” Rhys said, clearing his throat as he rubbed at a spot on his neck. “Maggie tells me you’re all off on your holidays tomorrow?”

I gave a watery smile, happy for the change of subject, though my excitement to go on vacation felt wrong after hearing of Jessie’s death. But it shouldn’t be wrong. That man deserved none of my sympathy.

“Yes, we’re flying to Minorca in the morning. We’ll only be there for a week, but I’m really looking forward to it.”

“Good, you deserve a break,” he replied, a hint of gruffness in his voice that had my chest tingling in a strange way. It was always like that with Rhys lately. Like we were constantly avoiding some emotion laden elephant in the room.

“What about you?” I asked. “Any vacations planned this year?”

“I’m taking Shay, Ross, and Eugene to Galway in a few weeks for Shay’s stag party. That’s about it.”

“Oh, I haven’t been to Galway though I hear it’s lovely.” Pausing, I continued, “I’m not sure if you know, but Maggie invited Nuala and me to the wedding. Nuala broke up with Martin a couple months ago, so we’ll be going together. I hope that’s okay?”

His eyes heated. “Of course, Charli. I’m always happy to see you. You know that.”

I nodded, sucking in a deep breath because there was so much layered emotion in his statement. God, would being around Rhys ever stop being so fraught with tension? I adored him so much, but I didn’t want it to always be this way. I didn’t want to feel like I was one second away from blurting that I’d been in love with him twice, and that even though the last few months had been amazing for establishing my independence, my heart still ached for him. Rarely a night went by when I didn’t dream of him, and I wasn’t sure I could survive if this man haunted my heart and mind forever.

“Right, well, thank you for coming to tell me about Jesse.”

“No thanks needed. I’m glad to be the one to let you know the prick is dead,” he replied, his eyes intense before he tucked a strand of hair behind my ear and murmured, “Have a great time in Minorca, Charli.”

When he turned and walked away, my skin still tingled from where he’d touched me.

***

“I think that might be the bravest, most heartbreaking thing I’ve ever heard,” Maggie said, speaking of Rhys and me parting ways.

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