Page 26 of The Accidental Ghost

He looked at Ralph as though he’d found the secret to life—which wasn’t really going to help her now. “I know what kind of ghost Raphaela is.”

Nina hit the steering wheel with the heel of her hand. “Fucking speak up, Ghost Hunter! Spit it the hell out!”

“Can I get a drumroll, Wanda?” he teased.

Complying, Wanda slapped the dashboard with her fingertips, grinning.

“A psychopomp!” he revealed.

You could have heard a pin drop inside the car as everyone processed that revelation, silently rolled the strange word on their tongues.

What in all of the Ghost of Christmas Past was a psychopomp?

Ralph hovered over a seat in Nina’s glossy, high-tech kitchen, with its sleek counters and a wall oven only Archibald used, her head feeling light, her nerves on edge.

They’d taken the tiny dog to the emergency vet and named her Gloria, for Gloria Gaynor, the vocalist of the song “I Will Survive”—because, she was, indeed, going to survive.

Despite all the blood, Gloria’s injuries weren’t fatal. Turned out, she had a couple of broken ribs, which explained the searing sympathy pain Ralph had experienced, and her leg had also been pretty mangled by the car, but she was going to make it.

The vet advised an amputation, for which all the women offered to pay, but Shamus stepped in and took care of everything.

He said Dale needed a friend, and Gloria was it. Thankfully, she was resting nicely and could be ready to join Shamus’s pack in as little as two days.

Now, as Ralph parsed all that had passed tonight, she couldn’t wrap her head around the category of ghost Shamus claimed was her destiny.

Psychopomp. It didn’t even sound real.

And she was feeling miserable to boot. Didn’t common ailments go the way of the dinosaur when you were a ghost? Yet, she felt positively green around the gills.

When she finally spoke, her voice sounded rough. “So, let me get this straight. I’m a psychopomp who hasn’t come into her powers yet? How on earth do you know that, and what’s taking my powers so long to get here?”

Shamus had taken off his knit cap and his leather jacket, and even as poorly as she felt, she couldn’t ignore how handsome he was. Or how ripply his abs underneath that T-shirt.

“I know because you were able to catch Gloria’s spirit before it went off to the Great Beyond. You knew where she was supposed to be, Ralph. You were confident her life would be good if she stayed. I’ve only seen that done by psychopomps.”

“You saw that?” she asked, her mouth beginning to water. How odd.

He smiled with a wink. “I did, because I can see ghosts, remember?”

Wanda rubbed her eyes, then cupped her chin as she leaned her elbow on the table. “She knew it wasn’t Gloria’s time and was able to prevent her from crossing by grabbing her spirit? That’s absolutely incredible, Ralph.”

Nina tapped the table. “So what does this mean for Glow Stick?”

“It means we’ve found her purpose, and it’s a really great one. It’s a real honor, according to all the ghosts I know, Ralph. It means you’ve led a good life and this is your reward.”

“Reward?” she repeated. How did the afterlife think it was a reward to see an animal suffer? “Explain. Please.”

“Maybe reward is the wrong word. Being a psychopomp means you’re a bit like a grim reaper, except your only obligation is to help people who’ve lived good lives. The cream of the crop—and the innocent, like Gloria. It’s a very prestigious position in the afterlife, with all sorts of privileges.”

“Do grim reapers only help bad people?”

“Not bad people, per se. Though, sometimes they do deal with the scum of the Earth. The absolute bottom of the barrel. In this position, you’ll never have to guide a bad guy into the afterlife. Your only job is to ensure good souls make it to the right place in the afterlife.”

Marty nodded, her expression somber. “We have a grim reaper friend. She does deal with some really horrible people. We’ve heard the stories.”

“You have a friend who’s a grim reaper,” Ralph said, her tone wooden. She didn’t know why that surprised her, but she was feeling tired and maybe a little crabby.

Marty smiled and popped a coconut cookie Arch had freshly made for them into her mouth. “We do. Her name’s Rocky, and she’s the sweetest. Though, she only deals in human souls. Not paranormals. Well, except me. She was supposed to take me to the afterlife. Long story for another time.”

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