Page 94 of Knotted Laces

“You’re right,” she murmurs. “I did say that.”

“Well, I need that space now,” I say, knowing I sound like a pathetic asshole, but unable to stop as the chant ofYou’re not good enoughricochets through my brain.

“Because you think what exactly?” she asks. “That I’m with you because of my case? Even though Jean-Michel and I didn’t talk until after what happened between us at the cabin? Until after I’d fallen for you? Until after I realized I love you?”

I want to believe that.Allof it.

So badly.

But…I can’t.

I inhale, my brain shouting at me, but not loudly enough to be heard over that incantation.

You’re not good enough. You’re not good enough.

“I need to go,” I rasp. “I fuckingneedto go.”

Silence, long enough this time to slice down to the marrow of my soul.

Then she turns back to her laptop and says quietly, “Then go, Cam.”

I hear it in her voice, the resignation, the acceptance, the knowledge that this day would come, and I fucking hate all of that.

But I can’t stop myself from spinning away from her.

From striding into the hall, passing Cookie—and the accusations in his gaze—on the way out.

Same as I can’t stop myself from driving away, from going home to my empty house, from shutting off my phone and losing myself in a bottle of whisky.

But even that doesn’t make the chant go away.

CHAPTER THIRTY

Athena

I pushout of the stairwell and step onto the floor to the knowing—and pitying—look on Connie’s face.

She passes me a mug of coffee without a word, and I’m grateful that she’s given it a rest.

Space.

It’s been aweekof space.

A week without a word from Cam.

I gave in and texted two days ago.

But he didn’t respond, and now I’m back to my normal pre-Cam life—pulling twelve-hour days and finalizing a raid on a warehouse in the outskirts of Oakland, its ownership hidden in a long line of shell companies, no tie to the Lyon’s evident.

At least until I’d realized exactly who Peter Auclair was—or rather, who he’srelatedto.

Second cousin to Frankie’s father, Francis Lyon, former head of the Lyon crime conglomerate.

Peter Auclair has all sorts of connections…

Anda gambling addiction.

Including on NHL games.

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