Page 55 of The Fall

When Rowan opens the scarf and photography books I got him, he grins happily.

“You remembered I like Ansel Adams.” He sounds genuinely touched. “Thank you, I can’t wait to look at these again and again.”

He helps the boys assemble toys and put batteries in them while Duke chews his Christmas bone in a corner of the kitchen. I put the casserole and cinnamon rolls in the oven, glad we don’t have to be over at Dom and Tess’s house until this afternoon.

This time with just the four of us feels sacred. I’m sure memories of Christmases past are hard for Rowan; I hope we can make new memories that will help ease that pain.

I can’t stop looking at my ring. He couldn’t have chosen anything better than he did. Including my boys made it incredibly special. My heart is overflowing with happiness.

When the boys are busy playing with new toys, he comes into the kitchen, wrapping his arms around my waist from behind.

“Merry Christmas,” he says softly in my ear.

I lean back against him and close my eyes. “Merry Christmas. Thank you for everything.”

“We’re official,” he murmurs. “That’s the best gift I could have asked for.”

“Well, you’re impossible to say no to.” I laugh lightly. “I hope you weren’t sweating whether I’d say yes or no.”

He’s quiet for a second. “I just wanted it to be right. I didn’t want to forget what I planned to say.”

I turn around and put my arms around his neck, looking up into his eyes. “It was perfect. Every day with you is like a dream come true.”

He wraps his arms around my waist. “I wasn’t sure I could be enough for you. You deserve everything.”

“You are so much more than enough. I don’t want you to think you can never be in a bad mood or have a shitty day. We all do. Let me be enough for you, too, okay?”

He nods. “Yeah. I want to do this all the way. You, me and the boys.”

I start to ask a question, stop, and then decide to be brave and go for it. “What would you think about having more kids someday?”

He grins. “Yeah, I want that with you. You’re an amazing mom.”

I kiss him. “Thank you.”

“Do you need any help with breakfast?”

“Nope, all the work is already done.” I let go of him and walk over to the coffeepot. “Let’s get some coffee going, though. It’s crazy early.”

I sneak a photo of my ring and shoot a text of it to my sister.

Cam: NOT AN ENGAGEMENT RING. But we are official!

Tess: Holy shit Cam! Please tell me you’re going to give that poor man a blow job now.

Cam: At the soonest opportunity. He was the one who didn’t want it before.

Tess: Oh he wanted it. Prepare to have a hole blown through the back of your head when he comes. That guy’s having a blue BALL Christmas fo sho

Cam: Have to go, see you later

I put my phone face down on the counter, trying not to laugh over her texts.

“Does Tess approve of the ring?” Rowan asks wryly.

I give him a guilty look. “I had to show her. I’m excited.”

“I’m not mad. I know you two talk about everything.”