Page 82 of Single All the Way

“Just an advocate for equal treatment.”

I laughed.

“Quit diverting the conversation away from yourself,” she said.

“I thought we were done. I told Emerson how I feel. She left. I’m sad, but I’ll get over it. End of story,” I grumped.

“People have to work through their wounds on their own schedule. Maybe she’ll be motivated to work on healing.”

“I used to hope,” I admitted. Like, last week or so.

I’d gone into our fling with my eyes wide open. She’d been transparent about her limits. I’d genuinely understood. Hell, I’d lost my wife too. I was no stranger to tragic loss. A single one could derail a person for a good long time, never mind the number of losses Emerson had suffered.

I’d hoped though. I’d hoped like hell, in the next few weeks before she moved out, she’d fall in love with me and find the courage to take a chance on a future. But she’d cut our time short, put an end to that chance, and extinguished my hope.

“What are you going to do about Christmas?” Berty asked.

“She said she’ll be back Christmas Eve. That way the kids will all be together to get up at the crack of dawn to see what Santa brought.”

“That makes the most sense.” She went silent for a beat, then asked, “Will that be difficult for you?”

“It sure as hell won’t be a picnic.” Closer to torture. “I’ll get through it just fine. I’ll focus on the kids.”

And wasn’t it fucking ironic that I was back to faking it till I made it as far as Christmas spirit was concerned? I wasn’t at all optimistic I’d feel it in time for Christmas Day.

“I strongly believe if something’s meant to be, it’ll be,” she said with conviction.

Before this, I would’ve said I did too, but I hated the position I was in now. Do nothing. Wait. See.

“I guess the big question is whether Emerson and I are meant to be.”

ChapterTwenty-Three

Emerson

As I drove away from Ben’s after leaving the kids with Berty on Monday afternoon, uneasiness unraveled in my gut.

Not that I’d had any easy feelings for the past four days since taking refuge at the Marks.

I missed Ben and his kids and Nugget and the other animals and Berty. Even that stupid screaming rooster.

That just showed how attached I’d gotten in such a short time. Kizzy had done me a favor by forcing me to see the mistake I’d been making.

My nervousness now was more immediate though and had everything to do with the real-estate showing I was on my way to.

Darius had called an hour ago about a house that was going on the market tomorrow. He could take me through it today if I could make it. As this was the first new listing that met my requirements in nearly three weeks, I would’ve rearranged whatever I had to in order to get there. Since the salon was closed today, I was more flexible than usual.

I’d debated taking the kids with me, but I’d decided to go alone to avoid getting their hopes up or, at the opposite end of the spectrum, worrying them about another change. Skyler was back to crawling into my bed every night at the hotel, so I didn’t want to fill her head with possibilities that might not pan out. My kids needed solid plans. We needed to settle. I’d vaguely told them I had an appointment and asked Berty not to mention where I was going.

I followed the map app’s directions to the house in the older neighborhood west of downtown to a house that didn’t yet have a real estate sign in the yard.

As I pulled up along the curb, my brows rose. The house was adorable, with a cute little front porch, a postage-stamp front yard with a tree that looked climbable, and a long driveway to a detached, single-car garage.

Darius climbed out of his car and greeted me. “Just look at that curb appeal,” he said excitedly.

“It’s super cute from the front,” I agreed. As we went to the door and Darius repeated the features he’d told me over the phone—three bedrooms, a partially finished basement, two bathrooms, a newly updated kitchen—I coached myself not to get my hopes up. I’d been let down every time so far.

Twenty minutes later, my mind was spinning. The house met every need on my list and looked cute doing it. The master was on the main floor. The two bedrooms upstairs were connected by a secret crawl space the kids would lose their minds over. The backyard was fenced in for Nugget. The basement would make a roomy play area. The kitchen was small but functional and remodeled in whites that brightened it up.

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