Page 8 of Utah

“We’re back on good terms. Don’t fuck that up,” Knox warned.

“There’s nothing going on anymore between us,” I added, an ache swirling around my heart as soon as I uttered the words.

“Uh-huh” was my brother’s only response.

I caught Utah staring at me, but as usual, I couldn’t read him. Never could, which was something that irritated me about the man.

There had been this massive push and pull between us ever since the first time he strolled into Rocky’s and ended up saving me from a customer who got too handsy.

After that night, he’d come in whenever I worked and sat at the bar, keeping watch. We’d talk when I wasn’t busy, and surprisingly, he was quite charming and witty. Two attributes I didn’t believe he showed many people. Case in point, when I told my sister about him, she had a hard time believing Utah had a personality. She’d met him a few times before, like I had, but he hadn’t said much. In fact, I remembered him grunting his responses.

One night after a late shift, he offered to walk me to my caras he had done numerous times before. Only that night, he stalled for more time, stretches of sexually charged silences dancing between us. Just when I thought I’d perhaps misread his interest in me, he leaned in and kissed me. I’d dreamed about that moment happening so often that I was elated when it finally did. But immediately afterward, he apologized and started to walk away. I stopped him, asking what he was sorry for, telling him that I’d wanted him to kiss me for weeks. He explained that I was off-limits because I was his friend’s sister. Although I thought the rule was stupid, I didn’t push the issue because I didn’t want him to stop coming to visit me.

Six days passed before he kissed me again, and it was then I promised him I could keep a secret if he could. Evie knew all about Utah, swearing not to tell anyone because of how our brother would react. Sometimes I think we should’ve just been up-front with Knox all along, and then maybe we could’ve avoided all the drama that ensued after he found out about us.

Lost in memories, I startled when Knox spoke again.

“How are you feeling? Do you need anything?” His attention was on Utah.

“I could use a shot.”

“Is that a good idea?” I blurted.

“One shot is not gonna kill him.” Knox headed toward the door, but before he left, he looked back over his shoulder. “And it’s probably best he stays with you because no one here wants to give that bastard a sponge bath.” His laughter trailed behind him as he disappeared.

Thanks to my brother, the image of Utah’s naked body flitted through my brain. Tall, broad-shouldered, long, wavy dark hair, defined muscles, and covered in tattoos—the man was a specimen to be cherished. Heat bloomed between my thighs, thinking about the last time we had sex.

“Are you okay?” he asked, his gruff tone turning me on even more. “Your face is red.”

I placed my hand on my cheek, a surge of heat warming my palm.Damn hormones.

“I’m fine, just warm.”

Moments passed in awkward silence, me trying to get ahold of myself as he continued to stare at me. There were so many things I wanted to say to him—one topic merged with another—but before I mustered the courage to speak, he parted his lips.

“How did the doctor’s appointment go? Is everything okay with the baby?”

I’d completely forgotten all about the sonogram as soon as I found out why Utah had missed the appointment. Memories of hearing our baby’s heartbeat for the first time overwhelmed me, and I began to cry.Seriously, am I going to be this hormonal the whole pregnancy?

“Is there something wrong?” He attempted to sit up, but I stopped him before he did any damage.

“No, no. I’m sorry. These hormones are driving me crazy.” I took a breath as I composed myself. “Everything is fine. The heartbeat was strong. It was so fast, I thought something was wrong, but I was assured it was normal.”

“I can’t believe I missed it.” The corners of his mouth dipped with disappointment.

“I think you were tied up with other things.”

“Tied up is right,” he grumbled, but I heard every word.

I couldn’t imagine what he’d been through, but instead of allowing my imagination to run wild, I diverted back to talks of the baby.

“Based on the size, I’m nine weeks along. He or she is about the size of a grape right now.” My hand instinctually rested on my still-flat belly.

“If the universe wants to make amends for screwing me over my whole life, that baby will be a boy.” A flash of a grin appeared as quickly as it faded.

“You don’t want a girl?” I hadn’t given much thought to how I’d feel about the sex. I barely wrapped my head around keeping the little one.

“I’ll be unbearable if it’s a girl.”

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