Page 22 of Utah

Utah followed me out of the building, his brooding silence causing my heart to beat quicker with every step I took. I wanted to throw my hands in the air concerning his upcoming trip because there wasn’t a damn thing I could do to change his mind. I wasted energy stressing about it, but no matter how hard I tried not to care, I failed.

I couldn’t wait for my shift at Rocky’s later. Some distance from him was what I needed, and the sooner, the better.

“Can we swing by the clubhouse on the way back to your place?”

“Why? Do you wanna go over your talking points for the cartel?”

“You’re not funny,” he grumbled. “No. I wanna find out if anyone made funeral arrangements for Crash yet.”

“Oh.” I instantly felt bad. “Did he have any family?”

“He had an older sister, but they weren’t close. He told me once she stopped talking to him when he joined the Knights.”

“Still, I’m sure she’s hurting.”

“I’d assume. Don’t know. Never had any family of my own.”

Every time Utah referenced his childhood, my heart ached for him. I couldn’t imagine what it would’ve been like to have no one in his corner. No one to care for him. Love him. Protect him.

I’d had my parents, until my father died when I was sixteen, and my siblings, and sure, we argued, but at the end of the day, they would be there for me when I needed them.

I veered onto the exit toward the clubhouse. “We can’t stay long because I have to get ready for work.” He didn’t respond, and I thought perhaps he didn’t hear me, so I repeated myself. “We can’t stay long because I have to—”

“I heard you.”

“You could’ve acknowledged it.” Whenever he audibly sighed, an argument quickly followed. “What?” I asked defensively.

“You know what.”

“Don’t start about me quitting my job.”

“I don’t know why you wanna still work there. You’re pregnant.”

“So?”

“So, you shouldn’t be on your feet like that, especially the bigger you get.”

I swore my feet started to ache as soon as he said that. “I need money, Utah. I can’t live off nothing.”

I enjoyed my job for the most part. I got along with my bossas well as my coworkers. I especially loved working with Lena whenever we were scheduled together. Most of the patrons were cool except for the occasional guy who got a bit handsy. But we had security ready for those instances. On top of everything, my tips were awesome, allowing me to not only pay my portion of the bills but also throw some money into savings. After all, I did have a baby to think about, one who would be here sooner than I was ready. But I supposed no one was ever truly ready to bring a human being into the world.

“I told you several times that I would take care of you.”

“With what?”

Utah helped the club out wherever he was needed, whether it be at Mendi’s or The White Cat, the two restaurants the club owned, or that god-awful strip joint. He also did renovation jobs on the side, mostly for the guys and the occasional referral, earning him enough to live on.

He’d done all the work at his place, a two-story home he owned on the outskirts of Laredo.

“I told you I have money stocked away.”

He told me once that someone had left him a small sum of money when he was nineteen. I believed it was from an uncle he didn’t know about. He never disclosed the amount, and I never asked. It wasn’t my business. But maybe now it was, especially if he kept insisting on taking care of me. Not that I’d let him.

“And your point is?”

“Goddammit, woman. You are so infuriating. I’m trying to do the right thing here, and you’re being a pain in the ass.”

“Right back at you.”