Page 18 of Wanted

The shop was doing great.

My nightmares were fading each night.

The only thing left was Alek.

In all of the time we’d been together, I’d only questioned hisfeelings for me once, and it was when I discovered he’d been watching me forclose to a decade. Otherwise, I knew he cared for me, loved me even. He’d saidso on numerous occasions, and they weren’t just words; his actions proved asmuch, as well. But after he rescued me, I felt him slipping away, and I didn’tknow if I was being paranoid or if something was really going on with him.

“I need a glass of wine,” I mumbled, unfolding my legs fromunderneath me as I rose from the couch. “Do you want some?”

“Do you really even need to ask?” She laughed and threw thepillow at me, hitting me in the back of the leg as I walked toward the kitchen.“So, spill it, Sara. What’s going on with you?”

“Can you wait until I have a drink before I answer?” I was tryingto joke, hoping some forced humor would do something for me, but it didn’t. Notat all. What I really wanted to do was take the entire bottle of wine, climbunder my covers and lose myself in oblivion.

I walked back toward the couch, bottle of wine and two glasses inhand. Kicking the pillow up with my foot, I flung it across the small space, actuallyhitting Alexa in the face with it.

Nowthatmade me laugh.

“Well played, Sara. Well played.” She laughed, as well.

She took the glasses from me and poured the drinks, sitting backin silence and waiting for me to start talking.

She arched a brow and I spoke. “Oh, Lex, I don’t know. I don’tknow what’s wrong with me. Actually, I do but I’m so confused.”

“Does it have something to do with Alek? Did you guys have afight?”

“I wish it was so simple, because then at least I would knowwhere I stood. No, it’s something else entirely. I think he’s distancinghimself. He’s different when we’re together now, which, by the way, is becomingless and less frequent.”

“Well, didn’t you say he was stressed out over a new building issue?Maybe it’s why he’s not been around as much. It’s possible that’s all it is,Sara.”

“You don’t see it. You don’t feel it like I do. Like the other night,for example, when he came here drunk. He was rambling on about how he wouldalways love me no matter what, and he needs to protect me but can’t do it whenhe’s so close to me. It was weird. He wasnotacting like himself, drunk or not.” For as much as I tried to hold back, Ifailed. A lone tear escaped and ran down my cheek. I wiped it away quickly, notwanting any more of them to fall and halt my conversation with my best friend.

“Is he the reason we’re now down one table lamp?” she teased.

“Yeah, sorry. He must have bumped into it when he came in. I’llpick up another one.”

“Don’t worry about it. I think you have enough on your plate.” Shefinished her glass and poured another.

“Thirsty, are we?” I asked as she took a few sips of the coolliquid.

“No, simply trying to squash my raging hormones.” She took anothersip, swallowed and said, “He practically attacked me in the hallway, whisperingall sorts of dirty things in my ear before letting me go. Then he simplysaunters down the hallway like nothing happened.”

I didn’t want to be the reason she wasn’t spending time with herman. “You can call him back, Lex, seriously. I don’t mind at all.”

“I wouldn’t even think about it. You need me more than I need tohave sex.” She tipped her head to the side as if she was contemplating the two.“Yeah, you need me more,” she repeated. “End of story. I need more wine, that’sall.” She laughed. We sat in comfortable silence. That was the great thing abouthaving a friend like Alexa. We can just be. We can sit together and not speak,all while still supporting each other.

Finally, I broke the silence. “Maybe he’s having a tougher timewith killing Samuel than he even realizes.” Simply saying those words made meshudder. “I can’t even imagine being responsible for taking another person’slife, no matter what the circumstances. The guilt I have for putting him inthat situation will always be there, but he must be dealing with somethingunimaginable.”

“Have you tried to talk to him about it?”

“Yeah, but all he does is shut down. He won’t talk to me, oranyone else.” After some contemplation, I nodded slowly. “Maybe that’s what theissue is.” I figured if I said it aloud I could make it true, although theuneasy feeling never wavered.

“I bet it is, Sara,” she saidcomfortingly. Poor Lex. She looked as hopeful as I was. She truly was a greatfriend.

“When was the last time you saw him, or even spoke to him?”

“The last time I saw him was when he came by drunk.But the last time I spoke to him was thismorning. He’s been busy all day in meetings and hasn’t had much time to talk.”

I missed him.

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