He walks back behind his desk, waiting for me to recuperate.

“I don’t know where to begin,” I explain after I sit down.

“Close your eyes, take a deep breath, and tell me the first thought that comes to your mind when you open them again.”

Our gazes lock. “Did-" I clear my throat. "When you met me, could you tell I’d been abused? Did you know?”His jaw drops and he scratches the back of his head. Another chuckle erupts out of me. “Don’t answer that.”

“Why?”

“Because I already know you did.”

“Why are you asking me this? Is it because of what I did–”

“No. No, it isn’t. I just want to know if I act like a victim.”

“You acted like a normal young lady, Astoria. I never saw you as a victim. Still don’t."

I chuckle. “Oh, come on, Doctor. Listen, for an entire year, I’ve had everyone around me walk on eggshells, bullshitting me, treating me like some fragile flower. I’m not a fragile flower. I survived the most fucked up situation you could possibly imagine. There’s nothing fucking fragile about me!” I stop when I realize I’m yelling and cover my mouth. “Oh shit. I’m so sorry.”

“Stop apologizing for everything. That’s the first thing you have to do to stop coming off as a victim. Someone gets hurt by what you say or do, fuck them, too bad.”

I smile and a heat rises in me. “That’s the sexiest thing you’ve ever said to me.”

At first the surprise at my statement widens his mouth and eyes, but then he titers. “Thank you, I think.”

I love that he can’t hold back the smile on his face despite his attempt. He pulls his bottom lip in and keeps it behind his teeth for a couple of seconds. Another heat wave rolls through me. “You said to just say what I’m thinking.”

“Yes. I did.” He averts his gaze, watching his own fingers pushing a pen around on the desk.

“Would you be my first fuck?”

“First-w-what?” Shock fills his face again.

“You heard me. I want to have a drink or two at a nice hotel bar, forget who I am, then you take me up to a room where we can see the entire city, and help me get past this.”

“Past what?”

Past today, Asher.“Yes or no?”

“Astoria–”

“I’m no longer your patient, Asher. Though I suspect I never was. Correct?”

He sighs. “Correct.”

“Then tell me.”

“Tell you what?”

I stand, slowly walk around to his side of the desk, and whisper in his ear, “Tell me you want to fuck the living shit out of me.”

He stands and cups my cheek. I lean my head into his palm.

“Please… Tell me,” I beg him with my eyes closed. When I open them, he’s still staring at my lips. He takes them, sucking on them and kissing me deep, his tongue dominating mine. A violent wave rushes through me, leaving every part of meburning, aching, throbbing, without any choice but to moan. It's a call to his aggression. He runs his teeth on my bottom lip. His mouth muffles my scream as he sucks on my tongue. I need him to take me so much that it hurts.Please!

My hands cup his face as my insides catch fire. He ends up slamming me against the bookshelf, kissing my mouth, neck, and shoulder. His hand cups my breast, then reaches down under my skirt and pushes my panties to the side to finger me.

“Oh fuck. Please–!”