Page 27 of Sacrifice

I let go of her hair, and she huffs at me. Aribella turns back toward the window. "I'm aware." With her head turned, I can't see her eyes, and that irritates me. I need to see what she's feeling. Even the sadness.

Espresso climbs into my lap and meows. He causes me to smile and I realize why Aribella has him. He's therapeutic.

"It's not going to be easy. I understand you need time and I'm willing to give you some. Just know you are safe. That's what matters."

Goddamn me. I keep playing those emotionally fearful cards. I hate myself for not showing her more kindness, to let her know that we can make things work. But it seems I can't let my guard down, either. Aribella sucks in a deep breath but doesn't turn to me.

Gently, I use my hand in her hair to turn her back toward me. With my other hand, I place it on her thigh. "Look at me,mi reina."

Slowly, she turns and I see the hurt, distrust, and confusion in her eyes. The way her hurt shows takes me a step back in confidence. I can't blame her for feeling it. Not at all, but shit. I didn't know how unprepared I was to face her strong emotions.

Chapter Twelve

“We don’t have the money for you to go to college!” Carlos yells at me. I lower my head. It’s the one thing I want to do more than anything.

“I’ll get a job, pay for it myself. We still have enough to cover all the bills for a few months, with us both working, we can make it,” I plead with him. This is my one dream. The farm is his.

Carlos paces back and forth. “Your job is at the farm. You don’t need an education for this.”

His words sting, but I shake my head. “I want to be a lawyer. You know that’s my goal in life.”

He looks at me with livid eyes, and I take a step backwards. “Well, find another one and stop being selfish.” As he walks out, I put my hands on the sink and try to calm down. He’s been acting so weird lately. Any time I get a chance to better myself, he gets upset with me and doubles down on his plans for the farm.

Why did we buy this stupid farm? I ask myself as I try to focus on Vincent and come out of the hurtful memories. Vincent’s hand creeps up my leg, past my knee. I cannot deny how much he turns me on. However, I can’t trust him. Then again, I don’t know if I can trust myself. I should be running far, far away.

There should be some kind of anger at Vincent for taking my brother away from me. For some reason, I feel a peace knowing that Carlos won’t be causing anymore issues. Or trying to lie to me about getting a job while I work two to keep us afloat. How horrible of a person does this make me? God, the guilt is eating at me as I think about my brother and how I should feel something other than relief.

Pushing Vincent’s hand away from my body, I pull my legs up to my chest and wrap my arms around myself.

“I hated my brother’s addictions and the way I had to try so hard to make things work. What’s horrible is I’m relieved he can’t get himself into any more trouble or put me down for having dreams.”

Sniffling, I wipe a tear off my face. “But you killed him. How do I trust you not to do the same to me if you decide you no longer want me around?”

“Mi reina, I don’t want to hurt you,” he speaks softly as he touches my face with his other hand. Espresso paws at me, and I pull him into my arms. My baby knows when I need him. As he purrs against my chest, he makes tiny biscuits and I bury my face into his fur.

The library door opens and Mossimo appears. “Boss, I need to go take care of some business at the casino. I wanted to see if you’d like to come.”

“No. If you can’t take care of it once you get there, call me. For now, take Leo with you.”

Vincent waits for the door to shut. “Tell me why you are relieved about your brother.” He pushes a piece of hair out of my face. “Did he hurt you?” His facial expression looks murderous at that thought.

“No. He never physically hurt me.” Petting Espresso, I take a deep breath. “My brother, for the longest time, was a good man. After our parents died, Carlos resented me and turned to drugs and gambling to cope with their death and the burden of having to raise me.”

When I don’t continue, he shifts and pulls me closer to him. “Continue,” he encourages, and a small smile graces my lips.

“I’m fifteen years younger than him. He had to quit college and take any job he could. That’s when he became a runner for some brothers down in Timberland.”

“Fuck, not them. Do they know who you are?” His body stiffens and fear overcomes me.

“No. He never let me near the city. Anyway, I was on the farm the first time he was arrested.” Sighing, I peek up at Vincent and trudge on with the story. “When he got out, he never went back to Timberland, and he somehow still always had a lot of money. It ran out, though, and so did the money our parents left us.”

He kisses my lips and strokes my back. “Get it all out,mi reina.”

“Christmas last year, we went to a casino for a party. That was supposed to be Carlos’s break into the political world. Instead, he made the sheriff and mayor mad.”

“Mi reina,” Vincent whispers before he pulls me completely into his lap. Espresso crawls behind us to look out the window.

“He didn’t want me to go to college, but I worked hard so I could. Before you killed him, we’d had a fight about how I couldn’t go back to classes in the spring. Carlos promised he would get a job and once we were more financially stable, he would think about letting me continue.”

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