Page 69 of Ruthless God

He stands directly in front of me, blocking me from leaving the kitchen. “Don’t worry about it. Just know I have eyes and ears everywhere.”

Slowly, I swallow big gulps of the sweet beverage. “Stalking is a crime, Snow. I don’t mind you doing it, but I need my privacy.”

“It’s not a crime if I don’t get caught.”

“Spoken like a true criminal,” I mock.

There isn’t any point in arguing with him, he’s going to do what he wants—he’s been like this since we were teenagers.

“She knew Bailey. She confirmed what we already knew. There is an address Bailey had written down on a sketch and a key she gave me. I think it’s to her ex’s house. I’m going there.”

“No, you’re not. I’ll do everything to protect you, Blue. Even if it means I lock you in this house.”

I shake my head. “You and your controlling ways, I swear. First, you popped up at my dinner with Professor Carter, and now you’re mad because I’m sneaking behind your back. You promised, Revi, but you’re just projecting your fears on losing me.”

He cups my face, rubbing his fingers along my bottom lip. “What would have happened if the girl you met robbed you? What about if someone kidnapped you? The park you went to is sketchy. You’re a small woman with little protection, and I’m not supposed to worry about you?”

I shrug. “I don’t know, but it didn’t happen. I can’t live my life on what-ifs, Snow. You can’t protect me from everything.”

“I will and I can. You can’t stop me.”

We used to fight about this all the time, and though I love that he wants to protect me, he has to trust me enough that I can take care of myself.

This conversation isn’t going anywhere, so I kick off my shoes, set them by the couch, then I yank the hair tie and my locks fall over my shoulders like a waterfall as I comb my fingers through my hair.

He follows me up the stairs, as I stroll to the bathroom, and he turns the golden faucet to the tub, sighing. I remove my clothes and toss them on the floor. He watches me with his hands folded across his chest.

Tears wet my eyes and I quickly wipe them away.

“What is it?”

“Bailey…” I want to cut myself again. I don’t want to feel this pain anymore. I want to release my blood that’s in my body because it makes me feel like I’m releasing my sins, my guilt. Keeping my eyes on the makeup bag with my razors, I quickly shake my head. If Snow found out I bought new razors and started hurting myself again, he’d be pissed. He told me he would cut himself if he found out I started again, and I don’t want him to hurt himself because of me. It’s an addiction that I can’t shake. I need to feel the pain. The hurt. “Rachel told me she had a plan to leave, that she was in a relationship with someone from North Haven University.” I can’t fight the sob that wants to burst free. “You remember when Bailey said she was going to London with Tim for a few weeks?”

He nods, sitting on the edge of the tub.

“I suspect she was getting beat up so much that she couldn’t show her face. She really was pregnant. She was leaving him because she wanted a better life for their child, and he found her and beat her up.”

Snow doesn’t respond but has a murderous look on his face, the one he makes when he wants to kill someone.

“I should have seen the signs. Why didn’t I see the signs? Why didn’t she tell me she needed a way out? I would have gotten her out of here, I would have given all of my trust fund money to her. I would have saved her.”

Snow’s quiet, staring at me.

“We both failed her.” His tone is low. “Bailey always went to great lengths to protect the people she loved, and she loved him. That’s why she never told us. She knew I would have killed him. When I find him, I’m going to do what I have to do to him. His death is going to be a slow one.”

Snow removes his pajama pants and boxers and slides into the tub, causing the water to overflow to the tiles.

I need a distraction from this pain. The hole in my chest has grown to the size of the Atlantic Ocean. I fight the urge to not harm myself.

“Use me as your fuck toy.”

He strokes my cheeks, kisses me roughly, then he grabs my neck, squeezing hard and coming close to cutting off my airway. He knows I want to be dominated by him, for him to have full control over my body. He lets go of me, yanks me by the arm and out of the tub, and carries me over his shoulders before tossing me on the bed. Snow grabs some zip ties and duct tape from the drawer and restrains my arms and legs. He presses the tape against my mouth. When he flips me over onto my front, he bends my knees into the soft mattress, positioning my ass in the air. I feel the head of his dick nudging the entrance of my pussy, and I groan. Snow has been my addiction, and I love when he uses me like he wants, giving in to my fantasies.

He slides inside of me, hitting a wall, then he slides out, yanking my hair so hard my scalp stings, fucking me until tears flow down my cheeks.

Snow

Jameson walks behind me as I open the door to White Rabbit’s house with the key Lyrical received from Rachel. This happens to be the exact same address which was written on Bailey’s sketch.