Page 40 of Ruthless God

He flips through the book to a section I bookmarked, crinkling his nose. “Hmmm,” is all he says, then he grabs my notebook from my backpack and begins to write out the problem step by step.

I close my eyes and open them, not knowing what to say to him. Normally, when we used to hang out, I used to be able to talk his ear off, but all the tension between us is too much for me to form words.

“I miss this,” he says out of the blue.

I tilt my head to the side. “Miss what?”

“Us. When we used to hang out. When you spent the night at my place and we would watch a good movie, how you would draw and sketch. Remember the time when we went swimming in the ocean for your birthday?”

“I do,” I answer.

My cheeks flush thinking about that night. His dick was hard, and I couldn’t help but think about how it would feel inside of me. We stayed on the shore all night talking until eventually, we fell asleep and our parents got worried sick because they couldn’t find us.

I miss my ex-best friend more than he knows, but I won’t admit it to him. “You always looked out for me, Snow. Even when I was being crazy and annoying. Even though we’re not friends anymore, I want to say thank you.”

He doesn’t say anything else as he continues to write out math problems, but I see a smile tug at the corners of his mouth. “Put onCoraline.”

“It always been my favorite.”

I grab the remote from the table, turn on Netflix, and find the movie. We sit in silence, but I can feel the tension building between us despite the silence. As the movie plays, I wrap a blanket around my body. Mindlessly, he snatches a pillow from the couch and places it on the floor between his legs.

“Sit here.”

Without a word, I sit between his legs, dragging the blanket with me.

For a moment, it feels like I have my best friend back. For a moment, I remember he was my first love and will always be my first love. I wouldn’t dare tell him that, because some secrets are meant to be taken to the grave.

Snow

Igrip the strap of my book bag while I head out as my father’s Porsche pulls up to the driveway of the mansion that’s on campus, and he steps out.

Great.

Fucking great.

I don’t want to see his ass.

What the hell does he want?

With his hands in his pockets, he walks up the driveway and stares me down. This shit is getting old. I wish like hell he would call before he shows up. I told Lyrical I would meet her at the library.

“Where are you heading, boy?” he asks.

Where does it look like I’m heading to?I want to say, but I don’t. Some battles aren’t worth fighting, and it’s not worth my time right now.

I sigh. “I’m on my way to meet Lyrical at the library.”

“I’ll walk with you, then we have to leave. Duty calls.”

“What duty?”

“You and Keanu need to take James Hendrix out because he stole money from the club.”

We walk the trail which leads to the campus, the silence between us thick and heavy. I don’t want to say the wrong thing to upset him. My father makes me feel as if I’m walking on eggshells—anything will set him off, and he’s been worse since Bailey’s death.

The birds chirp and the sky is cloudy. I spot people throwing Frisbees along the shore.

I need to tell him about what Lyrical discovered about Bailey, that she had a boyfriend.