Page 13 of Love Defies Us

I shake my head.

“He sees you as more than a dirty fuck.”

“No he doesn’t,” I say in defense.

He lifts his bushy eyebrows so high, they touch his forehead. “You think a man that can get cunt anytime, would jump through hoops just for one girl? He literally can walk down the street and women will throw themselves at him.”

“He told me he’s obsessed with me, but he means in a sexual way.” I cross my legs.

He sighs. “Sometimes men don’t know they like a woman because they are too busy thinking with their dicks.” He rests his arm on the back of the couch.

“He does ask me to stay for breakfast sometimes, but I turn him down, Felix is just being nice,” I tell him.

What if Jasper is right? No, he can’t be. When I’m with him, I don’t feel the weight of being the daughter of Tanner Bennett. I don’t have to worry about the high expectation and watching what I say or do worrying about tarnishing the Bennett name. If my mother knew I was sleeping with Felix, she’d throw a bitch fit. He doesn’t fit the bill as potential suitor. No, he’s as forbidden as the fruit in the garden of Eden. My mom wants me to marry someone that’s a CEO and shitting out millions a day. Whatever. I’ll do what I want.

“Well… have some fun while it lasts and don’t wear your heart on your sleeve.” He looks me up and down, then his face darkens. “We don’t have to worry about that with you. You hardly get emotional about anything.”

True. I was taught that emotions are weapons that can destroy people. That they make a person weak and they have no place in the business world. So, I tuck them away like they’re a best-kept secret. Strolling through life acting like nothing ever bothers me. That’s one of the reasons why I started writing in my journal. If I’m banned from showing any emotions, then it was no harm in getting them down on paper.

A few moments later, Stacey pussyfoot into the living room, and she stares at me with disdain playing on her face.

Her thick hair is the color of a yellow Warhead candy wrapper and brushes the top of her shoulders. Her skin is the color of ripe peaches. She’s a few inches taller than me.

“Jasp, baby. When are you coming back to bed?” There is a bit of a bite to her tone and she pokes out her pouty lips.

“Hey to you too, Stacey,” I say, and she doesn’t acknowledge me. She rocks on her heels and folds her arms across her breasts.

Bitch.I guess her momma never taught her any manners. I was taught when a person comes over to someone else’s home, you speak to them. Her personality is as lovely as a trash can. She thinks she’s better than everyone and treats everyone like shit. And she can’t hold a decent conversation to save her life. Airhead. Every woman—and sometimes men—think I’m a threat to their relationship. But I never viewed Jasper as anything more than annoying brother.

“The bed is getting cold.” The wooden floor squeaks as she shifts on her feet.

Desire invades his eyes and he smiles at her as if she were a rare gem. “I’ll be there in a few minutes.”

“Okay.” Her tone is light as a fat cloud on a summer day, and she twists on the heel of her feet and rushes down the hallway, the door slamming with a thud. I flick her off and roll my eyes.

“You can do better than her,” I tell him, trying to keep the annoyance out of my tone.

“I know, but damn, her fucking mouth does wonders.” He flashes me a wicked grin.

TMI. TMI. TMI.

He gets up from the couch. “Let me get rid of Stacey and we’ll spend the day together shopping, pedicures, and clubbing.”

I stand up from the couch and stretch my arms in the air and stand on my tippy toes.

“OK, I’ll go get dressed.”

When I’m not nose-deep into work or catching up on my latest show, I like to go to the club. Something about dancing and listening to the music vibrates through my soul, sends a thrill down my body. I love the atmosphere of it all. Upbeat and hype. Alternative rock soothes my ears and I twirl my hips with Jasper. He moves around me. He wears a navy buttoned shirt and white pants with matching Gucci shoes. My feet throbs from the stilettos, and I grab his shoulders and stand on my tippy toes and lean in his ear.

“Let’s go to the VIP section.”

We maneuver through the sea of bodies; the bouncer opens the glass door and we both sit on the pure white couch. I dust off my crimson dress with lacy straps zigzagging across my breasts, then my short dress rises above my knee exposing my ivory smooth skin. Sweat tickles my forehead and I fan my face with my hand.

“We haven’t danced in a long time.” he says. The waitress wearing a skimpy outfit takes our order then returns with a dirty martini and my favorite, cranberry and vodka. I sip slowly from the glass as the bitter and sweet drink chills my throat. As we polish off the next five drinks, we laugh and talk about everything under the sun. Jasper drapes his arms over my shoulder and we’re so close that our knees touch. He smells like expensive cologne.

“I saw that dark-skinned girl with the pink hair from Starbucks the other day. I asked her for her number when we were at the bar earlier. She’s going to join me and Stacey and Anthony when we get back from the Bahamas next week.” He smiles as if he won the lottery.

“Is there anyone you haven’t fucked?” I ask then set my drink down on the table.