Page 2 of Bidding on Her Orc Boss

Dammit. I need to go shopping. I’m already regretting my decision.

Maybe I can somehow call off sick? I fire off a quick message to Caro about perhaps being too sick to travel. She responds with a grinning emoji and that she would slap a mask on my face and dress me in a haz-mat suit.

Well, that was worth a shot.

I stare into the dark abyss of my closet, resigned to my fate. God help me.

Chapter Two

Xnaurl

Per my last email,you will see where I have included instructions regarding this process...

I glare at my laptop screen, feeling my blood pressure rise with each word. My fingers hover over the keyboard as I resist the urge to smash it to bits. This CJ, our so-called data tech, has some nerve, talking to me like I’m some simpleton who can’t follow basic instructions.

“Urul,” I bark, swiveling my chair to face my cousin. “Am I being insulted here, or have I finally lost my grip on the human language?”

Urul unfolds his hulking frame from the leather sofa he was lounging in and saunters over to my desk, his easy-going demeanor a stark contrast to my simmering rage. He leans in, squinting at the email, then lets out a low whistle.

“Oh yeah, cousin. You’re being insulted alright. This,” he taps the screen, “is what humans call their corporate way of calling you ignorant.”

I growl low in my throat. “Wonderful. Just what I needed today.”

My fingers twitch, itching to type out a scathing reply. But I know better. Gran would have my hide if I caused an interdepartmental war over an email especially one bearing the Vormugh Enterprises logo. Still, the temptation lingers.

“You know,” I mutter, more to myself than Urul, “there was a time when such disrespect would’ve earned this CJ a one-way ticket over the Rift. Now, I have to play nice and pretend I don’t want to cleave their head from their bodies.”

Urul chuckles, clapping me on the shoulder. “Welcome to the modern world, X. Where the battles are fought with passive-aggressive emails and emoji warfare.”

I roll my eyes, but can’t help the small smirk tugging at my lips. Sometimes, I wonder if I was born in the wrong era. Give me a good old-fashioned duel any day over this corporate nonsense.

I shake my head, my emerald skin flushing a deeper shade of green with frustration. “Do humans not have home training? Where I come from, even our fiercest warriors show more tact than this... this data tech.”

Urul laughs, his eyes twinkling with mischief. “I find that some have more than others. And those who don’t, well, sometimes it’s even more fun to teach them a thing or two.”

I groan inwardly, knowing exactly what - or rather, who - he’s referring to. Poppy, his lovely mate. The lucky bastard. WhileI’m stuck dealing with passive-aggressive emails, Urul gets to go home to a warm smile and an even warmer embrace.

“Your Poppy’s different,” I mutter, trying not to let the envy seep into my voice. “She actually wanted to learn our ways. This CJ person? All they’d care about is making sure the tabs are correctly color-coded, as if that is somehow a world-ending event.”

Urul’s grin widens, and I can practically see the fond memories dancing behind his eyes. “True. Watching Poppy get used to our customs is satisfying, but it’s a two-way street, as it were. Learning her customs and being with her family reminds me that we are more alike than we are different.”

I turn back to my laptop, hoping Urul doesn’t catch the longing in my expression. Sometimes, being the perpetual bachelor in a family of happily mated couples feels like a special kind of torture.

Urul claps a hand on my shoulder. “Give it a rest, X, and clock out for the night. We still have to prep for the sales meeting. Who knows? There might be a bevy of eligible maidens just waiting to be conquered by your surly charms. Forget about this CJ person for now.”

I can’t help but let out a snort. “Maidens? They’d be the end of me.” I shake my head, memories of my last disastrous attempt at romance flooding back. “You remember the betrothal our sires arranged when I was born? Yeah, I dissolved that faster than a sugar cube in hot tea.”

Urul raises an eyebrow, clearly amused by my dramatic proclamation. “And how’s your would-have-been bride faring these days?”

“Oh, just peachy,” I grumble, shutting my laptop with perhaps more force than necessary. “She’s found her own slice of happily-ever-after with a dryad and a centaur. Can you believe she still sends me an anniversary gift each year? As if I need a reminder of my spectacularly single status.”

I stand up, all six feet nine inches of green, muscular disappointment. “Trust me, I’ll be steering clear of any maiden, eligible or otherwise. I’m only there for face time with the C-suite. Gotta keep them happy so they’ll let me continue expanding our real estate empire in peace.”

Urul’s golden eyes gleam with mischief as he leans against my desk. “Come on, X. There are other ways to ensure the company’s longevity and profits. Networking, fundraising... you know, actually talking to people?”

I roll my eyes so hard I’m surprised they don’t pop out of my skull. “Oh, please. If it only took pretty parties to get humans under our control, we’d have won this game a long time ago. What’s next? Hors d’oeuvres and small talk as a path to world domination?”

“Hey now,” Urul chuckles, raising his hands in mock surrender. “The fae had their revels and the vampires their thralls…and they both found out the hard way that humans are tougher nuts to crack than all that. Besides,” he adds, his voice dropping to a conspiratorial whisper, “these are civilized times, cousin. Kidnapping and enslavement don’t exactly scream ‘long-term solutions’ anymore.”

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