Page 29 of Rancher's Return

“I guess. But I don’t know any of the kids here. And I don’t have a basketball.”

“I can get you one,” Buck said. “I didn’t know you wanted to play.”

He shrugged. “I didn’t play at the ranch.”

“Why not?” Marigold asked.

“I don’t know,” he said, looking down.

Buck had a feeling he did know. But he wasn’t going to push.

He realized then that while he had experience with loss and with pain, even with leaving home, he didn’t fully understand what it was like to be uprooted without your consent. To feel like everything was out of control. But these boys did.

Reggie’s mom was dead. He didn’t know his dad, and that made going home impossible. Maybe Reggie could get back to the house he had grown up in, but he would never be able to get back to the people. That was tragic. But Buck hadn’t really given a lot of thought to the fact that home, in the traditional sense, still existed for Marcus and Colton. Their parents were alive. The system had separated them. And yes, the addictions and flaws of their parents had separated them. But the grief it must have created inside them to havehomeout there somewhere, and yet still out of reach...

“Do you like baseball?” Marigold asked.

“I do,” said Reggie. “My mom used to take us to Fenway sometimes. When I was little.”

“My brother played baseball. He loved it.”

“Does he still play?” Reggie asked.

Buck’s stomach dropped. But Marigold didn’t look upset. She didn’t look at Buck either.

“No,” she said. “My brother died. But baseball is still a good memory.”

“Oh. My mom and sister died,” said Reggie. “But I think baseball is still a good memory for me too.”

“I’m sorry, Reggie,” Marigold said. “I know how hard it is to lose a sibling.”

Buck knew some people might feel like they were witnessing a sad moment, but the truth was, everybody at this table had experience with loss. That was why the boys had a solid sense of dark humor, and it was why Buck never scolded them for it. Because they had seen the real ugly things in the world, and there was no need to protect them from that. Not when they had lived it. With that in mind, he knew this was a profound moment. One that meant something.

Because Marigold was identifying with Reggie, not pitying him.

Because Reggie didn’t have to be afraid to talk about loss. It wasn’t bringing down the room. It was something they all understood.

Buck had talked to Reggie about how he had lost his sister when he was little. To have both adults in the room truly understand him on that level was probably a unique experience.

“Maybe we can play some baseball,” Buck said. “I’m bad at it. But there is a pretty good baseball team at the high school. The basketball team is terrible. But maybe they could use somebody who knows how to play.”

Marcus looked thoughtful. “I dunno. Maybe I could learn how to play baseball.”

Well. If you wanted a fresh start, that was fair enough.

“I don’t want to play sports,” Colton said. “There’s already too much homework. Anyway, I’m a senior. I’m not going to be here that long.”

“Do you have plans to go to college?”

“Buck says I have to go,” Colton said.

Buck couldn’t readily read the tone there. If Colton was happy about it or still annoyed. Colton had certainly never planned on going to college, not when he had been a kid in the system. But Buck was determined to give him the opportunity. If he didn’t like it, if he failed out, that was fine. Buck just wanted him to have the chance.

It was amazing just how much this felt like a family dinner, when that was... Ridiculous.

They finished up, and she thanked him for the invitation. He thanked her for dinner. They said goodbye like they hadn’t spent the last couple of hours having a deep conversation. Like they had just been adults interacting while their kids were studying.

“I’m meeting with a contractor tomorrow to discuss plans for the building,” she said. She looked down. “I wouldn’t feel comfortable doing that without you. Considering you need to approve that...”

---