“I’ll probably just pick up more girls with it,” Buck said.
That earned him a chorus of retching gags, and genuinely, he found that was his absolute favorite part of this parenting thing.
Driving the kids nuts.
It was mutual, he had a feeling.
But he took it as a good sign that they felt secure enough to mess with him. They all definitely had their own trauma. Marcus didn’t mess around using therapy speak by pulling it out of nowhere. He’d spent a hell of a lot of time sitting on a therapist’s couch, that was for damn sure.
He turned onto the long driveway that was so familiar. But he knew everything else had changed. His parents had built a new house in the years since he had left. His siblings had been kids when he’d gone.
They were entitled to their anger, his siblings. They had already lost their youngest sister when they lost him too. And life had proven to be even crueler after that. So maybe his running off had been part of the cruelty, rather than the solution. Sobriety and maturity made that feel more likely.
But at the time, he had simply thought everybody would be better off without him. Hell, at the time that had probably been true. That was the thing. He had self-destructed for a good long while. He was pretty sure he would’ve done that even if he hadn’t left.
So whether his family wanted to believe it or not, he really did believe that in the state he’d been in then, it had been better that he wasn’t around. And then he had been afraid to go back. For a long time.
But his dad hadn’t cut him off. His trust fund had still come available to him when he turned thirty. He supposed that should have been a sign to him. That he was always welcome back home.
But he’d left it untouched. Maybe that was the real reason he hadn’t used it till now. He had felt on some level that he would have to reconnect with his family if he took any family money.
And it was the boys who had given him a strong enough reason to do that.
He followed the directions his mother had given him to the new house. It was beautiful and modern. With big tall windows designed to make the most of the high desert views around them.
“I didn’t realize this place was a desert,” Marcus said. “I thought it rained all the time in Oregon.”
“In Portland maybe,” he said.
“There’s nothing here,” Reggie added.
“There’s plenty to do.”
“Doesn’t look like there’s plenty to do,” Colton said.
“You’ll be fine.”
“How come there aren’t any cactuses?” Marcus asked.
He gritted his teeth. “Not that kind of desert.”
“Are there at least armadillos?” Marcus, again.
“Still not that kind of desert,” he said.
“What a rip-off,” Marcus replied.
“I don’t think you want armadillos, from the sounds of things. They’re nuisances. Dig lots of holes in the yard.”
Then, talk of armadillos died in the back of his throat. Because he was right up against the side of the house. He got out of the truck slowly, and the kids piled out quickly. And it only took a moment for the front door to open.
His parents were the first out. His mother rushing toward him to give him a hug. She had been physically demonstrative from the first time they had seen each other again.
“Buck,” she said. “I’m so glad you’re here.”
“Me too.”
“Hey,” his old man said, extending his hand and shaking Buck’s.