Page 38 of Rancher's Return

Maybe this was a gift to the girl she had once been. The girl who had idolized him. Who had thought the sun and moon hung on his smile. The girl who had been so devastated and damaged after that accident that she had lost pieces of herself. Maybe it was a moment to give that girl a small fantasy.

Because hadn’t she been endlessly responsible? She had. She had made nothing but the best decisions every day of her life since Lily was born. And they had this small window. This couple of hours where nobody was here, where no one was watching them, and she just wanted to make one choice that was self-indulgent. Some might call it bad.

But they’d been so good. How could it be bad?

That was how she found herself taking a step toward him. And he didn’t move away.

She put her hand on his chest and startled. He was so hot, so solid. She could feel his heart raging beneath her palm.

It had been so long since she had touched somebody else like this, and the last time she had, it hadn’t been the same. It hadn’t been slow. It hadn’t been deliberate. She had wanted to be carried away from the moment. Right now, she wanted to linger in it.

She didn’t want to forget who she was. She remembered. Every year, every mistake. Every version of herself that she had ever been. She allowed all of those Marigolds to enjoy the moment. Because in that moment, she was flooded by a rush of forgiveness. Not just for him, but for herself.

For the foolish things, the hopeful things, the wild things, the self-sacrificing things and the indulgent things.

Because she was all the decisions she had ever made, good and bad. And one didn’t take away from the other, and none of it defined her either.

She moved her hand slowly down his chest, to the firm, flat ridges of his stomach. She stopped at the waistband of his jeans, her breath catching hard.

Then she reached her hand out to his face, tracing a line along his square jaw, relishing the sensation of his whiskers beneath her fingertips.

“You... You’re so...”

“Shut up and kiss me,” he said.

She didn’t have time to respond, because he wrapped his large hand around the back of her head and pulled her in close, his mouth firm and hard against hers as he claimed her with an intensity that was unlike anything she had ever experienced before.

His body was so hard, his hold so tight, so perfect. She wrapped her arms around his neck and gave herself over to the kiss. Learning how to do it all over again. She followed his rhythm, parted her lips, and when his tongue touched hers, she gasped. Then sighed as he went deep, luxuriating in the slick friction of it.

He moved his hands down her back to cup her rear, and she arched forward instinctively, reveling in his touch.

She didn’t know if this counted as one kiss, because eventually he was kissing her neck and back to her mouth again, then down to the curve of her breast.

She gasped.

He lifted her up off the ground and placed her on the counter, stepping into the space between her legs and deepening the kiss.

She wrapped her legs around him, realizing she was pushing this further, faster than she had meant to. But it was instinct. It was needed. So many years of not being held, not being touched.

She wondered then if she had been acting out of any sort of great restraint, or if she had been punishing herself. She had decided she didn’t deserve this. This magical alchemy of human connection. The glory of a man’s hands on her body.

Suddenly now she wanted it more than she could remember wanting anything.

More than she could remember wanting to breathe.

Nothing was simple about this. He was Buck Carson. Their son and daughter were dating. Their connection was loaded. Like a stick of dynamite. But then, so was this. This need.

She gave back everything he was giving. He growled, and when his hands moved to cup her breasts, a sudden rush of reality crowded in.

“Wait,” she said.

“What?” he asked, his voice deep, his words slurred.

“We can’t. Colton and Lily are dating. We are business partners, there is so much... There is so much stuff.”

He took a step away, letting out a deep breath. Then he looked up at the ceiling.

“What are you doing?”

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