Page 72 of Resisted

She reached down, her fingers grabbing my own, and the panic I’d felt mere seconds before vanished. What the hell was wrong with me? How had I spent this long denying myself when it was clear she was the only thing that would do? It was punishment, I knew now. Punishment for the one time I’d failed my team, failed myself, failed us all. But it was so long ago now that I needed to let it go for the good of my pack, for the good of myself.

The slightest tug on my fingers had me leaving my seat, causing a smile to light her face. Fates, but I wanted to see that smile every day directed at me. I longed for it. I craved it. Preferably with her mess of curly blonde hair spilled over the pillowcase as I looked down at her. I had to blink to clear my thoughts because if I let them roam, who knew how far my mind and body were willing to take them.

She turned, taking the few steps from my desk to the doorway and out the door. Only she didn’t cross the hallway into my room. Instead, she turned, heading toward her own. “What are you doing?”

“Taking you to bed.”

“We’ve passed my room.” I looked back for a brief moment toward my door, though I knew she couldn’t see the movement.

“If I leave you in your room, I know for a fact that you won’t sleep. You’ll think, plot, plan, and try to sneak back to your office.” She wasn’t wrong. “So I’m volunteering to babysit you. You need sleep, Silas. You run on practically nothing. You had a long day, you have to be tired.”

I was. I was mentally exhausted and physically drained, but only half of that had to do with my day. The rest was because of the self-inflicted torture I’d driven myself to over the past few months. Still, I had to fight it, just a little. Though my heart wasn’t in it. “If I promise to go to sleep, then…”

“I wouldn’t believe you.” Hell, I wouldn’t believe me either.

Her hand pulled me until we reached her room before she dropped it. “You realize I only have a towel on.”

“I noticed.” Her eyes flickered to me, and the glint of appreciation I saw made my beast want to roar. “But I trust you enough to know I won’t have to worry about anything. Besides, I’ve seen dick before… What’s the worst that could happen?”

I growled at her words. It was unintentional and unavoidable, but damnit, she didn’t have to point out that she had seen dick. I could still smell Vince’s scent imbedded into her, and my animal? Well, he liked that mix perfectly, but he was also jealous. Hell, I was jealous too.

“Let me change first,” I offered, already trying to pull away.

“It’s fine, Silas.” Her voice was so firm that for a moment, I froze, forgetting that I was the alpha of this subpack.

“If you’re sure,” I finally mumbled as she threw herself down on her bed.

Her enchanting eyes rolled. “Positive.”

Then she tugged on my hand, causing me to fall on the bed beside her. It felt nice, more than nice—perfect. It was absolutely fucking perfect to be in a bed with her, in her space, breathing in the same air and imprinting her scent onto my skin. She took in a deep breath and held it, closed her eyes, then let the air release. I watched her, despite how creepy it was, as I lay next to her, my head so damn close, our foreheads were lightly touching. I watched each breath she took with her eyes closed, memorized that she really existed on the same earthly plane as me.

Fuck it. I needed to tell her. I was going to tell her. I—

“Go to sleep Silas,” she mumbled.

“I need to tell you something, Bella. It’s important.”

She shook her head no. “it’s always important to you. Go to sleep, tell me in the morning.”

“I prefer to tell you now. No, I’ve got to tell you now,” I murmured, already fighting the urge to book it, the urge to run away from this commitment. I was weak, not strong enough to deliver this piece of information.

She rolled her eyes opened to stare directly into mine. Her body fit into the nooks and crannies of mine, like the missing puzzle piece she was in my life. “You can tell me in the morning. I promise you. It will still be as important in five hours as it is in this exact moment.”

The only thing was, I knew I wasn’t going to here in five hours, not when I needed to be on the road in four. “I can’t tell you in the morning.”

“Then tell me in the evening,” she mumbled under her breath. Then her chest rose and fell softly, and I knew it was too late. She had already fallen into a peaceful sleep, with her body against mine. I knew one thing was certain—out of all the mistakes I’d made, pushing her away was by far one of the worst. I wouldn’t do it again. I would spend a thousand moments just like this, making up for all I had taken from her until now if she let me.

I should tell her. I would find her family and let her choose to stay or go. The thought settled in my mind, my body nearly certain that if given the choice, Bella wouldn’t leave us. How could she? How could she leave when her body snuggled so close to my own felt so completely and utterly right?

I would tell her. Tomorrow night. After I met the person who claimed to be her family. I would deliver the good news, tell her she’s our mate, and hope that the fates were on my side and she decided we were worth staying for.

I would tell her.

Soon.

Chapter 30

BELLA

---