Page 53 of Owning Emma

I was terrified, not of the situation I was in or the danger that lurked where these men couldn’t reach, not of Roman or Shaw, or any of their men on this compound. No, I was terrified that tomorrow, I would wake up and this moment with these men, this moment I never knew I wanted with them would change everything between us. Would ruin us, break us, decimate the fragile friendship we had just started to build.

But despite my fear, I looked between them both and swallowed hard before saying, “Yes.”

Shaw shut his eyes and exhaled. “Yes, what?”

I licked my suddenly dry lips and they both groaned. “Yes, I’m ready to cross the line, if you are.”

Shaw took my fingers in his and leaned forward, pinning my hands against the mattress as he spoke close to my lips, “You have to understand this fully, Cardigan. I can only speak for myself, but if we do this, there will never be going back for me. This is it. You are it. And I can see my words scare you, but I don’t want to lie to you either. If we wake up tomorrow, I can’t . . . no, I refuse to pretend that we haven’t kissed. Touched.” He blew out a deep breath, “Fucked.”

The intensity in his eyes stripped me bare, the feel of his breath so close to my lips made me shiver, and I didn’t have to answer him, I couldn’t anyway. Instead, my lips leaned up and captured his, where I sucked his bottom lip into my mouth before biting it. He growled and pulled back, his eyes twinkling as he pulled off his shirt, gracing my view with all the solid ridges and angles of perfection that made up his torso.

Roman followed, as if for once, he wasn’t the one in charge and his orders came from Shaw. They looked at each other in silent communication before they both backed off the bed. Shaw instantly went for my pants and I squirmed, not sure if I wanted to pull away or help him remove it. He froze, his fingers just inside the waistband. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” I breathed, the word coming out airy and soft.

“You don’t have to do this, we wouldn’t ever force you.” I removed one of his hands and rubbed it slowly up my abdomen.

“I know . . .” I paused, looking between them, Shaw by my feet while Roman slowly walked toward my head on the other side of the bed. “It’s just . . .”

“It’s just what, Emma?” Roman asked, probably more sharply than he intended.

“It’s just I haven’t done this before,” I confessed.

Roman’s eyebrows shot up. “You’re a virgin?”

I felt Shaw’s hand on my stomach loosen, as if I suddenly became more fragile. I cleared my throat. “No, I’ve had sex before. Once. But, I didn’t um,” I felt my body heat with embarrassment, “I didn’t orgasm. And I’ve never been with two men.”

I couldn’t resist squirming now, knowing that I was exposed in front of them. That they knew what type of rookie I was in the bedroom, and that I was terrified of having them both even if I was excited at the thought.

Roman sat on the bed, his hands came to my hair, his fingers tangled in the strands before he slowly started removing the pins that were holding it up. I had let Bianca give me a makeover, painting my face in makeup and pinning my hair in curls while we waited to hear from the men. While we let each gut-wrenching moment pass, hoping and praying they were fine and not seriously hurt in the explosion.

“You don’t need makeup or all this shit in your hair.” Roman brushed a strand off my forehead. “You’re extraordinary without it.”

He didn’t address my fears and had played with the strands of hair, gently combing it with his fingers. The moments ticked by and I felt every one of them pulling me down with uncertainty. When I was sure no one would say anything, I bent at my torso and sat up, determined to get up and leave to suffer my mortification alone.

A sharp pull forced my head back, Roman’s lips brushed against the shell of my ear as he said, “I wish you were a virgin, so that all you would ever know in this world was the feel of our cocks inside of you. We can’t change that, so all that is left is to ruin you for any other. So that every single time you think of sex, images of our skin gliding against yours flash in your mind, followed by the way we make you scream while we are buried deep inside you.” He licked my ear softly. “Look at Shaw, he can’t take his eyes off us. You see his hand right now, rubbing against his jeans, trying to relieve some friction. That’s because of you.”

My eyes followed the direction toward Shaw who was watching Roman and I interact. His large palm running slowly against his jeans as his eyes fluttered. I leaned forward, reaching for his pants, searching for the button, but Roman stopped me as he found the hem of my tank top and pulled upward, forcing me to lift my arms as he removed my shirt, leaving my bare in front of Shaw’s gaze.

Roman’s lips found my neck. “No bra, in a man’s house? You naughty girl.”

I nearly moaned as he bit my neck before soothing it with his tongue. Then I pulled away again, this time grasping Shaw’s pants and pulling him forward. He leaned against me, bracing himself with one arm on the bed as I unbuttoned his jeans and slid my hand in, pushing them down his hip.

In normal circumstances, I hardly knew what I was doing when it came to the bedroom and a man. This wasn’t anything close to normal circumstances, yet, with them, it felt like I’d done it a thousand times before. There was no question on what I should or shouldn’t do, and neither of them objected as I touched the other.

Shaw was large, not like I expected anything less from the giant of a man, but still, holding him in my hand, running my palm over his smooth velvety skin as his breathing became unsteady above me made me feel like I held the power between us. Roman’s hands wrapped around me, skimming up my stomach before finding my breasts, and I arched my back, forcing them into his palms.

“I love the way my soot-covered hands look against your flawless, porcelain breasts,” Roman whispered from behind me, his body curling around mine as he tweaked and pulled my nipples, inciting a delicious array of sensations to course through my body. I let go of Shaw and turned in Roman’s arms, facing him.

“You still have pants on,” I whispered, our faces so close I could almost feel them touching.

His eyes crinkled a little. “It appears you do too.”

Before his words had fully left his mouth, Shaw had gripped the waistband of my pants and panties, pulling them down my thighs and exposing my bare ass to him. He rubbed my bare skin before yanking them down further, removing them completely before laying his heated skin against mine.

Roman bucked his hip against me and I didn’t miss his hint. I leaned down, kissing a trail down his abdomen until I reached his pant line. His skin was smooth, his muscles hard, and I loved the way they twitched wherever my lips touched. I unbuttoned his jeans and he shifted his hips toward me, allowing me to pull the jeans down his thigh.

My eyes locked on his as my hand trailed over his skin, then his eyes flicked to Shaw, another silent communication happening before Roman knotted my hair in his hand and gently pushed downward. I knew what he wanted, but it was new territory for me. I licked my lips, prepared to tell him so, when he spoke, “Just do what feels right, Emma. I promise I won’t be disappointed.”

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