Page 9 of Blade

“Beck, don’t be ridiculous. Why would we pay someone to do what someone else is offering to do for free?” Grams shook her head at me like I had just said the most insane thing in the world.

“So that there is no expectation on their part, Grams. What if they want something from you? What if they ask you to hold drugs here, or guns? You could get in a lot of trouble because you are indebted to them.”

Grams rolled her eyes at me. Setting her book in her lap, she gave me a look that clearly expressed her disappointment in me.

I sat on the sofa already feeling chastised and she hadn’t even said a word yet.

“Beck, I am so disappointed in you.”

See, I knew it.

I looked out the window, waiting for the lecture that I was sure I deserved. While I had heard a few stories of Grams’ younger, wilder days, Rachel didn’t have a wild bone in her body. I knew she wouldn’t be involved in anything illegal. Then again, I hadn’t seen Rachel in years. She was drastically different on the outside. She could be just as different on the inside.

Maybe I deserved the lecture after all.

“I can’t believe you would judge those men based on the fact they ride motorcycles. You know who you sound like?”

My shoulders sagged.

Yes, I knew who I sounded like.

My mother. She was the queen of judgement. She always judged my friends, especially my best friend. He was just a kid; he didn’t deserve her judgement.

Especially after he was gone.

Ten years ago

“Rebecca, I am sorry you lost your friend, but you have got to snap out of this. You will make more friends.”

“I don’t want more friends, Mom, I want Micah. He wasn’t just a friend; he was my best friend. My closest friend. The one person I could tell all my secrets to. He didn’t deserve to die.”

“No one deserves to die, well maybe his father did. I told you there was something bad going on in that home. When you live the life that man did, everyone else pays the price.”

I stared at my mother, dumbfounded. How could she honestly be so quick to condemn someone without really knowing anything other than speculation and gossip?

“I can’t believe you. You knew nothing about them.”

“Rebecca, honey, everyone knew about them. I never should have let you be friends with him to begin with.”

“No, what everyone knew was gossip. No one knew anything factual about them. You all just made up your minds based on prejudice because they lived in the nicest home and had a job you didn’t understand. All you do is judge people. Maybe you should look in a mirror once in a while.”

“Rebecca Lynn—” I didn’t hear the rest because I had run out the door. I had to get away from her before I said something I really meant, not something I would regret because she deserved it. There was already enough animosity between me and my mother. I didn’t need to pile on more.

Sure, his dad seemed a little questionable, but I refused to judge a child’s character by the actions of their parents. If I did, I could only imagine what people would say about me.

“Listen, Grams, I know you like them, but what do you really know about them?”

“Rebecca Lynn Washington, I have known those young men for five years, since they started that club. I know that every one of them has come over here occasionally to either check on me, visit me, or help me with something I couldn’t do myself. Can you say the same?”

Jumping to my feet, I cried, “Grams, that’s not fair. You know how hard it was for me to be in this town. You know how hard it was for me to deal with those memories. I left because you encouraged me to go.”

My eyes stung with unshed tears.

“I told you if I left, if I got on with my life, I wouldn’t come back here. I wouldn’t be able to let those memories back in. You told me to go.”

“And how are you dealing with those memories now?”

A single tear rolled down my cheek.

---