He sure smiled a lot. Was he really that happy all the time? Studying his face, I noticed his smile didn’t quite reach his eyes and now I wondered if I had missed something.
“I’m sorry?”
“I ordered ahead. No need to deal with pesky menus. An appetizer, entrée, and dessert. You can just relax and sit there looking gorgeous. I have taken care of everything.”
I blinked slowly, like I couldn’t comprehend what he was saying. He ordered for me?
I met Grant in my senior year of high school, and while technically we had known each other for seven years, we didn’t really know each other at all. Certainly not well enough for him to order food for me.
What if I had an allergy?
What if I didn’t like what he ordered?
Thankfully, neither of those would be an issue. I had never had an allergic reaction to any food, and there was almost nothing I didn’t like. He didn’t know that though.
It was the principle of the thing.
And just like that, memories of prom night came rushing back. Grant took me to dinner before we headed to the dance, and he did the same thing then.
I was so annoyed but, hearing my mother’s voice in my head telling me not to be ungrateful, I said nothing.
Should I say something now? Or just let it go? I’d let it go. It’s one night. Grant was a take charge kind of guy. I had forgotten just how much he liked totake chargein every situation. I was not a child. Food did not need to be ordered for me. The conversation with Rachel and the girls came flashing back to me, and I realized this was the mistake they said it was going to be. But I was here now, and I would make the best of it. When the date was over, I would never make this mistake again.
We made it through dinner with no fanfare. We talked about high school and college. He told me he was in real estate and how lucrative it was. He talked about the women he had been involved with over the years, which seemed an odd topic for what I thought wasn’t a date. Maybe he figured since I squashed that idea, he didn’t need to try very hard. He was right; still, I didn’t really care to hear about his conquests, though.
I told him about becoming a journalist and a highlight of what I had been doing over the years. Highlights pretty much summed it up. I hadn’t been living at all. Just going through the motions.
Maybe Ryder was right.
Maybe I needed to accept that the boy I hoped would be part of my life forever was really gone.
Living a shell of existence certainly wouldn’t bring him back.
Maybe if I could accept he was gone forever, I could move on. And if I finally moved on, I could find someone.
Have a family one day.
I wondered if Blade wanted a family.
Wait, no.
If I was ready to move on, it would not be with Blade, or anyone from the MC. Jack was the only one I could tolerate, and despite how hot the man was, he felt more like a big brother, even in the short time I had known him.
“Beck?”
Blinking, I looked up at Grant.
“Sorry, what were you saying?”
He tilted his head and looked at me. “Where did you go?”
“Huh?” I was not telling him where my mind was.
“Where did you go? You looked confused, but also kind of like you smelled something bad.”
Laughing to myself, yeah, thinking about Blade and Jack had that effect on people.
“Sorry, I just got lost in my head for a second. Something from a story I am working on popped into my head and I started running through a list of things I need to check into,” I answered with my head down, picking my fork through my dessert.