Page 71 of Ten Mountain Men

“And another thing—”

I don’t hesitate. I don’t want to hear what the other thing is. I have to stop this. I have to stop Luke from leaving. I’ve gotten used to, in my line of work, having to sit back and watch things unfold, for better or for worse, without interfering. I don’t know why, but the pull to intervene now is overwhelming. I can’t resist. I go in.

“What’s going on?” I ask, trying to sound as casual as possible but my heart feels like a drunk hummingbird having a seizure.

“These assholes are going to help you live out your Snow White and the Seven Sasquatches fairy tale,” Luke says to me, his eyes ablaze. Then he turns away from me and announces to his brothers, “I’m going to be in the big cave. Someone come fetch me when ya get to the unhappily ever after. And two words—Susie May.”

Susie May?

I have no earthly idea why, but I’m tempted to go to Luke, grab the sleeve of his flannel shirt, tell him that he’s not going anywhere until this is thoroughly hashed out—with my input, since I’m obviously at the root of this contention.

“Wait, what are you talking about? Who’s Susie May? What’s the big cave?”

I’m hoping The Big Cave is the name of some dive motel somewhere not far down the highway and not, actually, you know, a literal cave that’s big.

Buck lowers his eyes but then raises them again, meeting my questioning gaze. “Susie May is the only girl I’ve ever loved. Lynx loved her too. She loved us both. But then she forced us to choose which one of us got to be with her. We couldn’t.”

“And it about tore us all apart, but apparently they want to try it again with you,” Luke says.

What does he mean they want to try it again with me? Love? No, Buck said love, relationships, dating, those things aren’t in the cards for them. But…

Am I stupid?

Of course they want to find love. Everyone wants to love and be loved.

The enormity of what I’d been about to do hits me like a sucker punch to the heart. I have no doubt Buck would have sex with me, if I asked, but I was so consumed with thoughts of my own virginity, I didn’t even think to wonder why he’s still a virgin, since it doesn’t sound like any of the brothers have to endure a dry spell in the sex department, if they don’t want to, from the way Clay had told it.

“Wait, what? I do not want to tear you all apart!”

“You won’t,” Clay tells me, firmly. “Because it’s different with you. At least, I think it is? We all want to be with you. And we want you to be with all of us.”

But they’re arguing.

Because of me.

“Susie May thought it was weird, being with two of us, but you…” Lynx’s voice trails off, uncertain.

My traitorous clit has something to say about that, the reaction fierce and instantaneous.

“Not all of us want to be with you,” Luke barks, and my traitorous clit stops working altogether, I think. Maybe in a permanent way. “I’m going to pack.”

My eyes feel huge as I watch him storm off toward the attic.

“He’s bluffing.” Clay’s voice is assuring, but my eyes fill with tears. “You want us too, right?”

Luke’s words come back to me, pounding loud in my head like an entire drumline.If you hurt any of them, and I mean any single one of my brothers, me and you are going to have a problem. Got it? They may not look like it, but my brothers have hearts that can break.

I’ve just been thinkingSex! Sex! Sex!but…they want me? They all want me? They want me to want all of them? In what way? Are they just thinkingSex! Sex! Sex!too? It doesn’t sound like it, not if they’re willing to let Luke, their fearless and grumpy leader, theirbrother,move out, even temporarily. Choosing me to stay over him.

That is not okay.

This is not okay.

I shake my head. “He doesn’t seem like he’s bluffing. I’m…this is not okay. I should be the one to leave. I’m going to leave. I’m leaving right now. You all tell him.”

Without thinking anything other thanLuke can’t leave, without even thinking about my damned ankle, I clumsily hurry toward the front door and stumble outside, hobbling away from the cabin as fast as I can.

Brambles tear at my leg and branches rebound, smacking my neck and face as I push through them. My eyes burn, my cheeks damp from the tears I shed as I race back toward my campsite.

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