Page 52 of Royally Rivalled

“What?”

“Look, I don't want to get into it, Parker. But the truth is... I was once a princess in a tower. Neandia is conservative and religious. My grandmother was a bogeyman who locked us up and curated every aspect of our lives. I had this internalised shame. Every time I masturbated, I hated myself. Even when free, I was terrified of sex. Would it hurt? Would I be bad? The last year, I've both been determined to have my cherry popped and terrified by it.”

“I'm sorry you had that experience. Men have the opposite pressure.”

“Grass is always greener.”

I felt sympathy. Being locked in a tower was no good. And given all the societal expectations my mother always placed on us—the most crushing on me—I'd often felt restricted. Research and education set me free. I wasn't ready to explain that—or what had forever changed me—to Astrid yet. I suspected she'd understand, but I wasn't prepared to be so vulnerable. I'd told no one these realities. I held my cards close.

“Hotel rooms are novel to me.” Astrid changed the subject.

“What?” I chuckled.

“We never travelled. I was locked up, Parker. And... when I do travel, I often stay at a palace or embassy. Until I fought to move to the UK, I was always flanked by security and forced to stay in official residences. This is my first time being out in the world.”

I couldn't fathom that. I'd been sheltered, sent to the best schools, and—in many cases—had my friends hand-picked. I'd never been so protected that I hadn't lived until I was Astrid's age in my postgrad. The girl may have been a little quirky. Indeed, she probably deserved to be.

“Apologies. I had no idea. I'm glad you're out,” I said.

“Thanks. I'm out and not planning to ever go back.”

thirty-two

ASTRID

As dawn crept,I rolled out of Parker’s arms, having set my alarm for 5:30. While the hour was ungodly, I didn’t want to appear goneallnight after last being seen with Parker. He rolled into a ball as I left. It made his long, lean body appear small.

I pulled my clothes on and snuck down the hall and stairs, scarred by my elevator experiences. I went back into my room silently and rolled into my bed for another hour before my next alarm. My roommate hadn’t caught me at this point. I woke for the last time at the din of my alarm. My roommate startled and rolled onto her side, pulling her pillow over. I went to use the loo and shower.

Parker and I had to wake early to bang on doors and get students to the university campus. The call time was 9:30, and they still needed to eat breakfast. Some would do worse than others. I tossed my panties aside, noting I bled a little. That was normal.

It was worth it—all of it.

Parker was lovely and caring. He snuggled me as if he enjoyed me. This time, he didn’t make me feel daft. It was embarrassing how much I felt right now—and the intense change in my emotionstowardsthe boy I’d first assumed was an asshole.

Showered, quieted slightly, and ready to finish the day, I flew downstairs with my hair partially wet and pulled back in a braid. I found Parker eating. We were the first to arrive. I worried shit was about to get awkward.

“You… when did you?” Parker searched for words.

“About half five,” I answered. “Well, your half-five, not the Scandinavian half-five.”

“What?”

“You mean 5:30, as I now know. But Scandinavians mean it’s halfwaytofive- so 4:30.”

“How do you know that?”

“My mother was Danish. Lundhavn—where Rick is from—is the same way.”

He nodded, confused. “Are you padding for time? Because you needed worry. I’m… not expecting anything, Astrid. I just wanted to make sure I hadn’t offended you.”

“No,” I answered. “Not at all.”

“Good. And no one?—”

“No one was the wiser. My walk of shame was free and clear, and my roommate woke up as I left.”

He smiled and nodded.

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