Page 31 of Love Harder

I wasn’t left wondering.

I was no longer a ghostee.

I was a survivor.

Not a casualty.

And now, it was time for me to heal.

“You too,” I whispered, eyes closed as I said goodbye to the boy I loved.

Andthat’show our story ends…

Life is a fucking ride.

Up and down.

Side to side.

We don’t know what’s coming our way.

I thought Switzerland had checked out, but it’s funny because living this life,mylife, one would think I was the decider of my own fate. But that’s not how life works. It seems as though we’re in the passenger seat, watching life take turns we don’t want to take.

Switzerland was leaving in fifteen days.

I knew it.

He knew it.

He was chilled.

I was not.

His leaving hit me one night, and I just cried.

I cried because Switzerland showed me that good men did exist. He was everything I wanted, yet he was leaving forever.

We grew closer, which is against the sensible rules he laid down. But being with him was as innate as breathing. I didn’t have to try. We often lay together in silence, and it wasn’t uncomfortable.

It was still.

He would know something was wrong, however. He would often ask what caused my many sighs when I was deep in thought. Or asked what I was thinking when I was quiet.

He just knew.

I don’t know how he knew.

He just did.

I often caught him looking at me and asked what he was looking at.

He would just smile.

The memories I have of him are ones I will cherish for the rest of my days. Even though he occupies such a small time in my life, his impact was so vast.

The times we spent in his room or mine were ones of happiness and laughter.

He shared so much with me.

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