Page 93 of Love Harder

Me…

Simple.

I was scared.

As much as I hate to admit it, I was fucking petrified. Petrified of fucking this up.

My exes had always made me feel as though I was to blame for whatever went wrong, and it seemed as though this rationale tarnished this new relationship by my hand.

Angel, Sparkles, and Mötley were always in my corner and would support me no matter what, but this was one thing they all wouldn’t budge from. The Unicorn wasn’t like the other guysI dated. Hell, he wasn’t like most guys if we were to be fair. He was an anomaly. He was someone I was forever attempting to decode, but in the end, I saw him for who he was.

He was mine, and he wasn’t going anywhere.

Iwas the one who tried to sabotage us, but he was the one who promised me time and time again that it would be okay.

And he was right…

But please don’t tell him that.

The Unicorn’s birthday was soon approaching, and true to his star sign, he was the typical Cancer.

Although he didn’t believe in astrology, he still humored me.

When he said, “It’s 11:11,” something which I say daily, I wanted to kiss his face and never stop.

He did things that showed me he listened.

On the other hand, I don’t listen, which is why I wanted to throw him a birthday party, which I knew may not go down well.

The Unicorn made clear early on that he didn’t like gifts. He didn’t like people making a fuss. I didn’t want to force him into doing anything he wasn’t comfortable with, but it was his birthday, and I wanted it to be special because it was the first one we were to share.

And he was special to me.

I told him about my plans, certain he would politely decline. But he didn’t. He said he would love it.

I went on to plan a small gathering. It gave my friends a chance to meet the man I was spending my time with.

I didn’t want to overwhelm him, but I wanted to buy him something special, something he could look back on and always remember this day.

It goes without saying, unicorn gifts were bought, as was a watch that I wanted to see on that inked wrist. But as mentioned earlier, The Unicorn likes to drift over to my side of the bed, so to prevent any confusion on whose side was whose, I got our names embroidered on pillows and placed them on our sides.

The stage was set, and when The Unicorn arrived and saw his party in full swing, I worried I had done too much. I didn’t want him to be uncomfortable, but putting myself in his shoes, I understood why he may feel a little uneasy.

He mingled, but he seemed ill at ease.

Was it too much?

Cake was eaten, and again, I didn’t know if The Unicorn wanted this night to end already. He wasn’t ungrateful, but he just seemed uneasy the entire time. Our guests left as I had planned a night out. However, I was wondering if perhaps we should just stay home instead.

I was getting ready in my room when The Unicorn entered. It was the first time we were alone all night.

He looked at me, and again, the Rubik’s Cube presented itself.

I thought I had done something wrong.

I then remembered the pillows.

I asked The Unicorn to turn them over, and when he saw them, I knew I hadn’t. I realized that perhaps this was just a lot for a man who had never really experienced a birthday like this before.